I pretty much agree with all that wrote, and I think it's hard to argue with. But I'd say that it's like this with a lot of things in the digital age -- things people used to do together can now be done virtually by people who are, for whatever reasons (which include brain rewiring), doing them in a more isolated way. I think part of online findom has to do with the same kind of delivery of dopamine hits and such that are baked into online gaming, the Facebook news scroll, etc.

Everyone is different. I do findom, but I don't watch findom clips (I still will look at the kind of conventional clips you describe), and hate any language like "loser." If the person I do findom with were to stop, I'm not sure I'd do it again with someone else. It's very calibrated relationship at this point. It's just that I have the same nagging feeling as you about my diminishing interest in face to face. Again, though, it's different. I used to see pro dommes, would enjoy my interactions, but only got to know them on the most minimal of levels, which was fine. The woman I do findom with -- half of our calls have no play, and while I won't call us friends, it's a friendly kind of relationship, which makes the times play is involved very startling. After our last spate of calls I mentioned something about how I couldn't do it all the time because of the cost. (It would be cheaper to session with the highest-rate domme in NYC.) She said that she had given me something I couldn't get anywhere else, and I made a reference to just seeing a pro domme for $300 an hour. She laughed and said, "Yeah, but she wouldn't mindfuck you like I just did." And she was kind of right.

As I wrote previously, I would like to get back to face to face because I think it would be healthier -- which, from the vantage point of me 20 years ago, is a statement I'd be surprised I'd be making.