I (along with most other Mistresses) could probably fill a book with the insane, often funny and sometimes sad, emails we receive. These two came within an hour of each other and I couldn't resist posting for everyone's amusement. I've not included any identifying information of course, but hey, these guys deserve a little public humiliation for being so - . . . . whatever it is they are. Spelling and grammar have not been corrected.

Email #1

what I would like to experience is to be placed in a modified coffin.

A coffin that I will modify so I can be kept in it for a longer time.

I would make a hole where my mouth is to breath fresh air and so it's possible for you to give me meal replacement shakes and water so I get everything in need to stay healthy.

I would make a hole at the rear with a tube going down into a big container so I can poop whenever I need and it will go down into the container and it will be sealed so you can't smell it.

I would be given a uretic catheter and that would go outside the coffin in another container so I can pee whenever I need to and will directly go into the container which will also be sealed.

When I'm put into the coffin you would fill me underwear with stinging nettles so I will experience harmless but very intense pain on my cock and balls the whole time I'm in the coffin.

It goes on and on, but you get the drift.

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Email #2

I love you Mistress Ayn. I'm wishing IM married to you
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And then there is this one that came in a couple of days ago . . .

Email #3

I have been trying to find a mistress that is interested in fulfilling my fantasy it is sick,risk and weird. Here it is I want someone to remove my penis and testes from my body. I live in (town removed) Ontario Canada and can't find anyone my name is . . .

HEY!!!! I wrote you email #2 in confidence!!!!

Actually, at FetLife there is a group dedicated to idiotic messages from guys that is hilarious. The sad solicitation emails we receive

Thanks for the link - a little something to keep Me laughing when I start feeling like I have a bullseye painted on My forehead. I think these things come in cycles. I am certainly in a cycle of crazies right now.

HEH... glad to see that my evil plans are beginning to bear fruit *evil twisty mustache pose*

More Crazy ass requests internet minions... We need to convince Mistress Ayn that I am one of the sane ones out here!!!!

Not surprisingly, you aren't the only one who got email #1

https://fetlife.com/groups/13634/group_posts/10927637

Yeah, those guys usually make the rounds. I hadn't checked in with that group in a while, so I just commented there.

They do come in waves. This one just in today. Notice that he introduces himself as "ricky" but signs the email "martin". I might consider it if we could get that $10K in escrow ;-)

Hello Miss Ayn

I would like to introduce myself, I'm Ricky and I'm 27 years old and I would like to ask you a question.

I hope you won't judge me and I know it's something people could find going to far but I just have to try it because I can't keep it a fantasy anymore.

Couple years ago when searching online I found story about penectomy where a slave lost his dick for real keeping his balls functioning so he would still feel aroused and pain but the dick was gone.

This idea has started to grow on me and i think it's the most cruel thing a woman can do to a man. Make him lose his dick and let him live life with a lot of frustration because the balls still work.

So now I am searching for the mistress who likes this idea and wants to play one simple game where my dick would be really on the line.

There would be official legal document where I sign that if I fail to give the right answer to the question of the mistress then I will lose my dick.

In the document there will be written that the mistress is never in anyway responsible for anything.

The mistress can decide the question and ask any question she wants.

If I lose and give the wrong answer the mistress can choose if she wants to give the penectomy or that she wants me to go to the hospital to get the penectomy there.

With losing my dick I would also lose 10.000 to be payed within 3 days after I lost.

I can only do this once and it would be my honor to do his with you.

So my question is would you like to be the mistress I do this with?

martin

See... and that is why you think you love me... I keep you in tune with all the cool kids

Respectfully, this is how Dommes get themselves in trouble. They don't pay enough attention to the details... >:-Þ



He never says dollars... he just says "10.000" and that is a period, not a comma so we are talking only 10 of something. Could be dollars, could be marbles... well, maybe not marbles because if he is serious he has already lost all of those.

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Historical Note: Pointing out things like this to Dommes is how Asp got his FREE penectomy

True on all counts.