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#18603 - 03/26/23 07:23 PM Re: Discussions about how men get fetish desires met with other providers [Re: international]
Mistress Tissa Online   content

Sage

Registered: 11/02/15
Posts: 738
Loc: Philadelphia
Originally Posted By international
You probably didn't mean it that way, but comparing non pros with "black market" may be misunderstood.


That was just an example of the kinds of things I've seen discussed but contextualized for my example of cosmetic surgery. It wasn't meant to be a perfect analogy.

Quote:
I also like to emphasize that the "cheaper" doesn't apply to my non-pro sessions, they turn out to be more expensive.


OK, great. Please tell that to the guys who talk about budget kink with non-pro Dommes.

Quote:
Historically, guilds have had a purpose of establishing quality standards. However they mainly served protectionism. Eventually, they crumbled because they couldn't keep up with innovation.


If someone wanted to discuss how a professional Domme could innovate the practice of professional BDSM that would make sense to me. Wanting us to lower our tributes for dudes who are broke or cheap, or adding escort services to our menu when we're specially not meant to be escorts is not "innovation" it's a symptom of entitlement. Who goes into a vegetarian restaurant and sits down at a table and whines because they don't offer steak? Or that they charge $6 for fries when McDonalds charges $3?

Quote:
Is it possible that this site is following the same fate?
Another popular thread is titled "Where have all the topics gone".


Logical fallacy here. If forums like this are dying it's not because women like me are asking men to please not use this space to talk about seeing escorts or strippers for kink, it's because of it.

These types of discussions drive away and undermine the women running this board with discussions about how to find a way to get kinky needs met with people other than the women running the boards.

Again, I understand wanting to have them, I just am asking that they be done in a space where it makes sense.

I already gave my thoughts about why I think we are seeing a decrease in participation: this interface is old and has been replaced by new, better options, which appeal to younger generations who did not grow up with the things we did and therefore coming here feels like a visit to Jurassic Park.


Edited by Mistress Tissa (03/26/23 07:28 PM)

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#18604 - 03/26/23 11:39 PM Re: Discussions about how men get fetish desires met with other providers [Re: Mistress Tissa]
nysubjack Online   content
Regular

Registered: 10/19/15
Posts: 153
I have been following this thread closely and have been impressed with the quality and civility of the exchanges. I can certainly understand the desire for some to find less expensive outlets for their kink, but I think Mistress Tissa makes the stronger argument for why this board is not the appropriate place for those conversations.

The board was created for purposes of providing a positive and respectful place to discuss professional female domination. While those glory days of MF may be gone forever, it seems inappropriate to introduce topics that undermine that profession. I think the slight was unintentional and certainly without malice as the posters on this thread are, for the most part, well experienced and well intentioned.

I can see that reading posts discussing/promoting alternatives to sessioning with ProDommes on a board supposedly devoted to Professional Female Domination would be frustrating (insulting?) for ProDommes to read.

I have never met, talked or sessioned with Mistress Tissa, but I am grateful that She is one of the very few ProDommes that actively participates on this board. Maybe we can all be a little more respectful of Her and Her peers in our posts.

Final point. Most on this board would agree that serious BDSM, with a ProDomme or anyone else, is an inherently risky activity. Subs/slaves are literally putting their physical and emotional well being in the hands of whoever they are sessioning with.

Just speaking for myself, but this is a risk that I definitely don't want to award to the lowest bidder.

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#18607 - 03/27/23 11:50 AM Re: Discussions about how men get fetish desires met with other providers [Re: Mistress Tissa]
international Online   content
Artisan

Registered: 07/25/19
Posts: 95
Thanks for your well formulated response.

I fully agree with you about the "other services". No argument, these topics are not appropriate here.

Your restaurant analogy is very good.
Ruth's Chris probably doesn't see McDonalds as a competitor. They both cater to different audiences (or the same customers at different occasions).

What you and most pro Dommes offer is a luxury service and not everybody can afford it.

Being price-sensitive is OK, I don't condemn somebody who is looking for a budget approach. Where I see the problem is, when I go to a Ruth's Chris and haggle with them for McDonalds pricing, and you probably have made these experiences.

Simply discussing different opportunities on this boards to me doesn't take away anything from the service that you and other Professional Dominas provide, rather the opposite, you can distinguish yourself and it helps to vitalize the board.

I have stated it clearly, for me to session with non-pros is not a financial decision. I look for other qualities.
Because this doesn't really fit to this topic, I have opened another thread: Why do you go back?

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#18609 - 03/27/23 12:21 PM Re: Discussions about how men get fetish desires met with other providers [Re: nysubjack]
international Online   content
Artisan

Registered: 07/25/19
Posts: 95
No plan survives the first contact with reality.
That's why Venture Capital investors don't put money into ideas or plans, they put the money into people. With the hope that the entrepreneur will not stick to a plan, but adapt it.

I wasn't part of the planning committee for this site. But I can see that it is not over-bursting with life. "Traveling Dommes" for instance takes me back almost 5 years.

So even if the original plan was to stick to Pro Dommes, it might not hurt to learn for instance from wine magazines: Many of them started out with premium wines only but added budget wines as well. It didn't hurt the premium wines.

In reference to your last sentence:
I fully agree with you about the risk. But in this context, I have made an interesting experience:
Non-professionals never objected to a health-check (which I pay for) prior to a scat session. The same cannot be said for all professionals. Some did feel offended that I even asked for it.

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#18621 - 03/28/23 06:42 PM Re: Discussions about how men get fetish desires met with other providers [Re: international]
Mistress Tissa Online   content

Sage

Registered: 11/02/15
Posts: 738
Loc: Philadelphia
Originally Posted By international
Simply discussing different opportunities on this boards to me doesn't take away anything from the service that you and other Professional Dominas provide, rather the opposite, you can distinguish yourself and it helps to vitalize the board.


Local man determined to drive away last remaining pro Dommes, more at 10

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#18622 - 03/28/23 09:39 PM Re: Discussions about how men get fetish desires met with other providers [Re: international]
nysubjack Online   content
Regular

Registered: 10/19/15
Posts: 153
International, thanks for your response.

you posted....No plan survives the first contact with reality.
That's why Venture Capital investors don't put money into ideas or plans, they put the money into people. With the hope that the entrepreneur will not stick to a plan, but adapt it.


No one has invested money, or made money from this site in years. There are a few Dommes who post here and if they do generate a few clients from being involved here then more power to them. The site was intended to be a place for ProDommes and people interested in them to connect and share information. If you feel the need to obtain or share information on how to session with other than ProDommes then maybe your better move would be to create a social media platform for that purpose rather than to post comments here on how to session with people other than ProDommes.



You posted.....So even if the original plan was to stick to Pro Dommes, it might not hurt to learn for instance from wine magazines: Many of them started out with premium wines only but added budget wines as well. It didn't hurt the premium wines.

I like wine, especially good wine. The most respected wine magazines actually don't sell wines, they educate and inform wine lovers. Wine subscription services do indeed sell premium and less expensive wines. What they don't do is offer advice, or allow comments, on where to purchase wine from other sources.

And your last comment....I fully agree with you about the risk. But in this context, I have made an interesting experience:
Non-professionals never objected to a health-check (which I pay for) prior to a scat session. The same cannot be said for all professionals. Some did feel offended that I even asked for it.


Sorry, I should have provided some context to my previous post regarding the importance of a ProDomme's experience and skillset. I was referring to risks that are best avoided by sessioning with a ProDomme who has a greater skill set than that needed for scat play. For example, activities like throwing a flogger or whip, needle or electrical play, complicated predicament bondage sessions, suspension etc. are all activities that I would not trust to a strip club employee or any of the other sources mentioned in this thread. Not going with the lowest bidder for activities like that.

No offense to strip club dancers, or scat providers is intended. If I wanted a lap dance a strip club dancer would be my first choice. I completely agree with your asking for a health check before engaging in scat play, and hope others who share your interest in that regard follow your lead.

Sorry that you can't agree that advising people how to avoid sessioning with ProDommes at ProDommes rates on a site supposedly devoted to ProDommes is really in poor taste.

Maybe think about this thread from the ProDomme's point of view?


javascript: void(0)
[i][/i]

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#18624 - 03/29/23 05:34 PM Re: Discussions about how men get fetish desires met with other providers [Re: Mistress Tissa]
international Online   content
Artisan

Registered: 07/25/19
Posts: 95
Sorry, I don't understand where you are going...

But the last thing I would want is to drive away Pro Dommes, I'd rather like to have more on this board!

In any case, thanks for moderating this board! I really do appreciate the work you put into it. While I may have a different opinion about this particular subject, I do respect your position and will follow your rules for this board.

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