I'm always curious at how much activity this forum has in comparison to MF. (truthfully both are pretty dead) Anyway, I thought I'd post this on both and compare numbers for views and replies in a few days.

There was a thread talking about Brutal Gemini, Empress Katarina Kahn and Lydia McLane on Maxfisch (all were located in the PNW and all were pretty far up the intensity scale in terms of play style) That got me thinking about how or if location relates to intensity of sessions or severity of Dommes

I think we all know that Europe and especially Germany and eastern Europe seem to offer more Dommes playing closer the more extreme end of the spectrum...... (Europe is also more likely to offer some form of sexual interaction than more puritanical America but that's another topic.)

Do you think Dommes in certain regions of America are more likely to engage in harsher play styles?

edit....second question....

On average do you think Dommes today are offering sessions of greater or lesser severity compared to 20-30+ years ago?

Interesting question. I think most experienced Dommes are capable of going from soft domination to the extreme, but the area they are in may dictate their perceived offerings.

As an example I think the resident subs of Atlanta are a pretty soft core bunch. If you put too many clips or pics out there showing brutal CBT or corporal, you will scare a lot of them off. I've actually had that happen - a session is scheduled and they get all worked up and start buying clips and then say, "woah, I can't handle all this" and they cancel. I love the extreme (at least some of the time) but have to be careful showing that I cater to that.

On the other hand, Atlanta has become known as a place where you can put together complex fantasies that require multiple players (primarily due to the existence of Atlanta Dungeon and FemDom Mansion) and has become a destination city for subs seeking that. It doesn't necessarily mean you can't find that elsewhere, but that's what we have become know for and I would say the same could be said for subs specifically looking for more hard core sessions. If you get two or more Dommes promoting more extreme sessions in an area, that area could become a destination for that type of session. Make sense?

Regarding your second question: I think with the internet (read social media) facilitating so many new, inexperienced and untrained "Dommes" entering the sphere, there is a weird loop that is created. They promote things like findom, a higher degree of sexualization, less emphasis on traditional skills, etc and that has precipitated a different kind of client that is less into the extreme, strict or more protocol driven of sessions. Personally, I think it is a loss to the industry but nothing stays the same.

Interesting. Thanks for the insightful reply. I hadn’t considered Dommes having to walk that line between attracting new clients and scaring them off in terms of how they present themselves. I guess I’d forgotten that not everyone understands that a good pro Domme has the skills to provide everything from a “tie and tease” experience to severe CBT or a caning that leaves wheals and welts for a week.

I had wondered about your second point. With BDSM becoming so much more mainstream I can see where you’d have both far more untrained or inexperienced Dommes and subs who would tend to dabble.

I will say my subs do vary with the location. My NJ subs tend to be more into sensual domination, my MA subs tend to be more into discipline, my CT subs to be more into feminization, etc etc.

Interesting. I hadn't considered that the interests of subs would vary by region. I guess that raises the question if a Domme's specialization varies by location because they are focused on offering what sells?

Good question.

I doubt most long lasting Dommes would specialize based on the location over their own interests. Advertising something they didn't enjoy would probably give them really bad burn out. Do some Dommes do activities that aren't their top favorites? Sure, but they wouldn't specialize in them or advertise them heavily in my opinion.

Golden showers are highly requested in my area, but I still won't do them. I can confidently say I'd see at least a 15% increase in income if I offered/advertised them, but it's just not worth it to me.

Domme Lynx,

You have a great website and social media presence. I really enjoy and appreciate your comments on this forum. Thanks for taking the time to be such a positive presence here.

Just curious, since GS is a pretty common offering, why do you not include it as part of your session activities ? No disrespect intended and not attempting to tell you what to offer or not offer. Just curious as to why you feel this way.

Aww, thank you nysubjack that's very sweet.

One of my very first pro sessions I was pressured by the dungeon I worked at to give a GS. Showers were never really in my interests, and I had no experience giving one but I was willing to give it a shot to see if doing it would open my mind. Unfortunately I was assaulted during that session, which absolutely ruined that activity for me. It is a hard, hard limit now. I'm glad I never really had that much interest in it anyways, so it probably would've wound up on my limit list at some point anyhow.

My hard limit list is, in my opinion, pretty long compared to the average Domme. I find putting activities I don't like off the table and settings other strict boundaries has kept my love of kink happy and healthy. It's hjard to not feel like a fetish dispenser otherwise. Although this limits the clients I'll attract and lowers my possible income, it's 100% worth it because I won't be burned out with the clients I do have chemistry with, leading to mutually satisfying and fulfilling scenes. I'm sure if I did more activities I didn't enjoy my overall session quality (and mental health) would suffer.

Domme Lynx, thanks for the reply. I am so sorry that you had such a terrible experience. No woman should ever experience assault. That certainly explains why GS are not something you are comfortable incorporating into your play.

From a sub's perspective, it is possible to feel a loss of chemistry when a Domme is engaged in a style pf play that she is not enjoying. The vibe just seems to change. I think your decision to focus on play that you enjoy helps to explain you success and the fantastic reviews you get.

Again, thanks for the thoughtful reply, much appreciated!

I guess this goes to the nature vs nurture for dommes. I am more on the nurture school of thought, so unless you think that interests are genetic not acquired tastes, than what was popular the time you were learning might depend on the location.