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#13541 - 02/28/21 06:42 AM Male Owned FemDom Businesses
Cheyenne Online   content

Pooh-Bah

Registered: 07/12/19
Posts: 1797
How do people feel about this? I saw recently where a male owned dungeon is getting criticized for it. I don't know the situation there to comment on it specifically. But, I will say, in the many years I spent as a prodom and video producers, it doesn't seem to matter the gender of the business owner. I've met my share of good and bad ones. The good ones operate from a mindset that they are providing a service to the people who work for them. That is the case in the mainstream world to. If done correctly, the employer works for the employee to provide a good and productive atmosphere. I don't understand the hang up people have with a femdom business being male owned. Am I missing something here? How do you feel about it?

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#13542 - 02/28/21 08:20 AM Re: Male Owned FemDom Businesses [Re: Cheyenne]
Spark Online   content
Artisan

Registered: 08/15/19
Posts: 70
I have to admit when it comes to femdom i would prefer to spend money at businesses owned by women. Its a very intimate transaction and for me that intimacy is maintained by making it between me and another woman.

All of the money I have spent over the last several has just be an arrangement between me and a domme. I haven't been to a professional dungeon in quite a while. If i did i would prefer it to be domme owned or women owned

For me this actually extends beyond femdom and most of the business and services i pay for in my vanilla life are women owned. Thats not a kink its just a personality trait. Although my submissive tendencies might have something to do with it.

Quote:
If done correctly, the employer works for the employee to provide a good and productive atmosphere.


On a different note. This was great insight on how any business should be run. I have tried to take a similar approach over the years with my businesses and it has served me well

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#13544 - 02/28/21 10:01 AM Re: Male Owned FemDom Businesses [Re: Spark]
Cheyenne Online   content

Pooh-Bah

Registered: 07/12/19
Posts: 1797
I understand your feelings on the subject. My late husband felt the same way, vanilla or kink. As someone who has worked in the vanilla world for about 10 years and full time in the femdom scene for 20, I have to say that gender doesn't take a role in how people are treated. For those of us old enough to remember DDI, who cannot say Bless David Jackson? DDI was a gift to both customers and doms. What a sweetheart of a man he was to create DDI for us. I feel the same about properly run owned dungeons, regardless of who owns them. I have seen both women and men business owners be both awesome and horrible to women. For some reason, it bothers me more when it is coming from a man, especially in the femdom scene. But, I've found it to be rare and those kind of businesses owners don't last long in the scene. It is really about where prodoms choose to work and what type of responsibility fits their life style. I started my own dungeon over 20 years ago because there were no options for rental at that time in Columbus, Ohio. It worked out great. But, I would much rather have had a place to work out of without all of the responsibility. It's super nice to walk into a day of sessions, have a blast and, then go home until next time. Even if it is a man that owns a well run dungeon, I find it empowering for a woman to have a place to session with no worries but showing up and having fun.

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#13549 - 02/28/21 03:10 PM Re: Male Owned FemDom Businesses [Re: Cheyenne]
Spark Online   content
Artisan

Registered: 08/15/19
Posts: 70
Mistress Cheyenne,

I too have seen both good and bad business owners regardless of gender.

In my hometown for a longtime we had 2 competiting women owned dungeons. I visited both and from the outside everything appeared well run. Overtime several of the mistresses i sessioned with quit and moved independent. They shared similar stories about how both of these owners were controlling, demanding, made false accusations and difficult to work for. Only one side of the story but it was consistent enough that i believe it. I find that disappointing when we all participate in a kink and a lifestyle around worshiping women.

The plus side is that the mistresses i sessioned with have started their own business and they seem to be doing quite well while those 2 original dungeons have gone downhill.

That Karma thing is a bitch

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#13552 - 02/28/21 07:23 PM Re: Male Owned FemDom Businesses [Re: Cheyenne]
AspX Offline
Sage

Registered: 07/08/16
Posts: 825
Loc: Detroit
I think men have issues dealing with other men in regards to their submission to women regardless of ownership structures & I think Dommes have a serious issue with men being involved in their business since so much of it is about female leadership.

Some of this opinion is formed by knowing Dommes & having conversations, but most is because a male friend of mine owned a house-style dungeon in the Detroit area for about 10 years. It was started in partnership with his wife, who was a lifestyle Domme, but he had to completely run it when she got sick and eventually died.

Dommes in the Detroit area absolutely hated him even when he tried to reach out to them. Part of this was the business model that he used, which was to charge lower rates & thus get more sessions, but part of it was that he was a man who employed Women to work there.

As for guys, until they got used to it they would totally flinch at the fact he was at the building and collected the money for the sessions (he did this so the women were protected from LE by not handling money for the session) & in many cases would hang up as soon as a male voice answered the phone.
_________________________
Asp


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#13553 - 02/28/21 08:48 PM Re: Male Owned FemDom Businesses [Re: Cheyenne]
DominaChan Offline
Member

Registered: 11/14/19
Posts: 5
Writing this on an alt account because I'm actually scared to write it on my main.

I wont be giving any names but I've worked with two male dungeon owners in the East Coast. Both were constantly pressuring me to session with them and pushing my boundaries. Neither created a good atmosphere and both had a lot of issues. One got quite aggressive and scary when I politely gave him two weeks notice. Unfortunately those were my only experiences.

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#13554 - 02/28/21 09:02 PM Re: Male Owned FemDom Businesses [Re: DominaChan]
Cheyenne Online   content

Pooh-Bah

Registered: 07/12/19
Posts: 1797
That is terrible. What creeps. Did you leave and go independent or find a better place to session?

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#13555 - 02/28/21 09:22 PM Re: Male Owned FemDom Businesses [Re: AspX]
Cheyenne Online   content

Pooh-Bah

Registered: 07/12/19
Posts: 1797
When I first began doing sessions in the 90's, I was the only dom at my studio. It was the day of same day sessions. I couldn't keep up with the volume. For every hour or two I was in session, 3 were lost by not answering the phone. A good male friend of mine was in between job at the time. I hired him to answer the phone by saying, "Lady Cheyenne's slave, how may I help you." Same experience as you describe. The caller just hung up when they heard a male voice. Half of the time, when they heard a female voice, they hung up too....they breathed into the phone, asked what I was wearing and jerked off first. It was annoying at the time but funny to think about now.

I've never been one for lowering price to compete. Quite the opposite, in fact. Charge top notch and return the same in quality. Dungeons competing for clients who are price based and looking for the lowest price will often receive the lowest quality of clients. A good dom doesn't have to worry about what her perceived competitor is doing. All she has to do is focus on what she is doing and maintain good work ethics.

It is never good to see dungeon wars going on...but it has happened in different areas that I've seen over the years. It comes from a place of insecurity. Scene folks are better off to support each other and focus their attention on what they are doing, not what someone else is. More than likely, if it was a female owned dungeon in Detroit dropping rates, the reaction would have been the same.

The bottom line, in my experience, isn't male or female dungeon owners, it is just about being nice to each other. Mistreatment is always creepier coming from a male in a femdom business. But, in my personal experience, I can't say that it happens any more often than from female business owners. I'm also happy to say that most of the the time, it just doesn't happen at all. And, if it does, the women in this business are strong enough to move on and find other venues or start their own.

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#13556 - 03/01/21 12:11 AM Re: Male Owned FemDom Businesses [Re: Cheyenne]
DominaChan Offline
Member

Registered: 11/14/19
Posts: 5
I tried renting from a Domme but that was also terrible. She constantly made my appointments late (I'd book a time for 1pm days in advance and she wouldnt let me in till 1:30 etc), left the place disgusting, and got mad at me when one of her clients commented on my picture on fetlife. I went independent and I've never been happier!


Edited by DominaChan (03/01/21 12:12 AM)

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#13557 - 03/01/21 01:43 AM Re: Male Owned FemDom Businesses [Re: DominaChan]
jacky b Offline
Artisan

Registered: 10/26/15
Posts: 72
Loc: SoCal
i remember one session at a facility in the LA (Hollywood?) area. i was shocked as it appeared to be run by the Russian mob! i think it was "Extreme Models Place?" i was so scared for the Ladies there and of course never went back. It felt like trafficking for many reasons, but one was the fact that many of the "Dommmes" were Asian. Broke my heart, but didn't know how to fix the situation. i believe they no longer exist - hope so!!

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