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#10983 - 05/23/20 02:14 PM Re: If You Married A Femdom Would You Take Her Last Name? [Re: Miss Adah Vonn]
Soapy Online   happy
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Registered: 10/10/15
Posts: 537
I really like that idea!

Aside from hyphenated names getting unwieldy I like the symbolism of a couple choosing a new name together. As equals, taking on a new identity and a new life together. Sharing equally in the benefits and burdens of taking on a new name,showing the world you belong to each other.

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#10984 - 05/23/20 02:16 PM Re: If You Married A Femdom Would You Take Her Last Name? [Re: Mme Veronica]
Soapy Online   happy
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Registered: 10/10/15
Posts: 537
Its not oppression if I wanted to do it. To get into that sort of relationship to begin with I would need to respect, admire, and think the world of that woman. If that was the case I would want to do things for her.

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#11001 - 05/24/20 05:57 AM Re: If You Married A Femdom Would You Take Her Last Name? [Re: Soapy]
Mistress Tissa Online   content

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Registered: 11/02/15
Posts: 683
Loc: Philadelphia
Originally Posted By Soapy
My answer is conditional.

I think the historical roots of wives & children taking a man's name are based on flawed thinking and oppression.

I also think doing the inverse to make a statement is still reinforcing that tradition and still rests on the same faulty thinking.

I do think there is practical value in a couple and their children all sharing the same last name.

Outside of practical issues I don't have a strong preference for any style of nomenclature.

I would take a woman's last name if doing so had a strong meaning for her and if I agreed with that meaning. I would do it out of my love for her.


I agree with what you're saying here, Soapy.

I would not take anyone's name, man or otherwise. I would not expect him to do the same for me (though my last two partners indicated they would take my name if we married).

As a person who has a knee-jerk response to various traditions, I would rather see men take women's names. But tend to think that what's even more interesting is when a partnership results in a new name for them both. Whether it's hyphenated or a new name altogether. A potential genealogical headache, but fitting symbolically.


Edited by Mistress Tissa (05/24/20 05:58 AM)

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#11004 - 05/24/20 08:42 AM Re: If You Married A Femdom Would You Take Her Last Name? [Re: Mistress Tissa]
Soapy Online   happy
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Registered: 10/10/15
Posts: 537
Originally Posted By Mistress Tissa
. But tend to think that what's even more interesting is when a partnership results in a new name for them both.


I hadn't heard of this idea before.

I really like it. It seems to have a lot of positive "team spirit", positivity, and a strong statement behind it.

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#11005 - 05/24/20 08:59 AM Re: If You Married A Femdom Would You Take Her Last Name? [Re: Mistress Tissa]
junglebeast Online   content
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Registered: 06/15/19
Posts: 424
Originally Posted By Mistress Tissa
But tend to think that what's even more interesting is when a partnership results in a new name for them both. Whether it's hyphenated or a new name altogether. A potential genealogical headache, but fitting symbolically.


I'm open-minded about a lot of things but too damned traditional... yeah old. I don't know. I'm not sure how I would have reacted in "the Dark Ages" when my wife and I got married. In my experience a few longtime couples we know, friends and family, the wives have kept their maiden names professionally (in a couple of cases hyphenated it), but legally the name they use is their husbands. I once worked with a guy who was very forward thinking at the time (around 1980) and when he got married he hyphenated his name.

All of this is about respect, comfort and a bit of practicality (home loans, credit cards... legalities) mixed in.

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#11093 - 06/02/20 05:02 AM Re: If You Married A Femdom Would You Take Her Last Name? [Re: Cheyenne]
Komodo Online   content
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Registered: 07/12/19
Posts: 426
I think that this is more interesting as a hypothetical question than a real one. Usually a domme uses a different name in her trade, like Cheyenne. I think that some respondents are thinking of that name rather than the real name, like Porky Rogers. The same goes for subs, my real name is not Komodo. I think that most people want a separation between their play and their life, and they want privacy in their life.

Taking the name of the wife draws attention to both in a way that probably neither of them would want.

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#11137 - 06/13/20 02:56 PM Re: If You Married A Femdom Would You Take Her Last Name? [Re: Soapy]
BiSlaveBoy Offline
Occasional

Registered: 07/17/19
Posts: 28
I would take whatever she wanted......to be married to a Femdom is the dream! She could write my vows....she would own everything, would control everything, I would promise to honor and obey and grovellingly serve until death do us part....or she kicks me to the kerb.....for which I would be eternally grateful....my mistress's decisions are without question.

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