Session length

The post below about costs for multiday sessions got me thinking about this. While I'm sure multiday is out of reach for many do to costs, ability to be incommunicado for that long or simple lack of interest I wonder about regular "extended" sessions. Historically when I played the standard was an hour.

I normally do 2-3 hours but if I can fit in the time and have the money I have enjoyed 5-6 hours.

What's your preference?

Dommes? What do you prefer in a session inquiry?

I always did one hour sessions when I first started but started finding them too short. Two hours is now pretty much my standard but I will occasionally do a shorter one especially if it’s a Domme I’m seeing for the first time. This lets us both get to know each other, judge chemistry, etc before we do a longer session

I’m intrigued by the idea of a longer session but would need to think through what activities that would entail and I think it would need to be with a Domme I knew well. I have a fairly narrow list of interests and would want to make sure we could fill the time

Good point. I think people need to think about extended sessions carefully and what they might realistically include. They can't be a 1 or 2 hour session that just goes on and on and on non stop.. I think they are probably best for a sub who either enjoys service (cleaning, working for the Domme, maybe taking her shopping or out for a meal etc while maintaining a scene dynamic).... or one whose interests include being left in heavy bondage or extended periods of captivity in a cage, cell or isolation box.

I've found predicament bondage can be good for this but it requires a fine hand. Many common predicament riggings become quite unbearable fairly quickly. It takes a Domme with good rigging skills to come up with a situation a sub can reasonably endure for an extended period of time (think an hour or two or three not 10 or 20 minutes) while still "suffering" to a certain degree.

I am a pure spanko. One hour is more than enough for me.

The short answer is that it depends on the mistress and the chemistry. When seeing a new mistress I always book an extra half hour to talk.

I am a chatty guy myself, and the more I know about a mistress, or the more I am interested the more I want to talk. Not necessarily about the session.

One mistress thought I talk so much because I am afraid. Maybe but I doubt it. I am not submissive, I am definitely against humiliation, and I would not session with a mistress who does not like me. Talking is part of establishing the connection without which the relation would not last.

I agree. I also like to start a session with a new mistress by spending some time in conversation. Some may be about the session but often it’s everything from traffic, travel, do you like dogs to isn’t flying a PITA these days.

As far as time? At least 2 hours. It allows enough time to drop into the scene and it not feel rushed. Unless someone wants something simple. An hour is good for Foot Dom or spanking but not much else.

Sometimes I get a sub who underestimates how much time it takes to do everything on their list. It usually less experienced players. I just help them trim things down. I mean, I could do the equivalent of a shopping spree where you're running around grabbing as much off the shelf as you can before the time runs out...but that's not sexy.

Love the analogy.

Time really is one of the key components of a great scene isn't it?

It depends on what you're trying to accomplish.

In some cases, I can effectively accomplish what I want in 1 minute. In others it might take a few years.

2 hours is my go to. 3 hours on occasion. I dont have enough activities to fill much longer. Like some have mentioned i also enjoy chatting before and after to build a little of a relationship. If its 3 hours i normally build breaks in for both of us.

When i do longer than that is normally a mix of social time and session time which i also like. For what its worth if we are doing a session and a dinner i like doing dinner after the session. I think that is opposite of most people but hey im weird i guess :-).

I don't know about "most people" but my preference is the same as yours.

I agree. I also tend to have dinner after the session and I don't think this is the exception. However if we substitute social time for dinner it depends on the activity.

I'm going to be the odd man out here. I think that meeting for a meal, shopping or something similar prior to a session would greatly increase the anticipation and excitement.

I think you are very mainstream in this. Unfortunately my time is severely limited but I love every minute I can spend with my mistress before during or after the session.

Further to this I think the "right" session length is also somewhat dependent on the Domme......both her skill set and her playspace/equioment etc.

My longest pro session was years ago with Mistress Brianna of DC She had a full basement filled with custom things like cages, crosses, an isolation box, bondage chairs, a bondage wheel, overhead attachment points as well as countless racks and shelves of restraints, hoods, gags, electro boxes, CBT stuff, dozens of CP implements and other gear. It was as is she'd gone to major equipment suppliers like Fetters and Mr S and ordered one of everything!

Multiple positions, lots of variety and 6 hours flew by.

Having a great Domme who you connect with matters tremendously but she also needs enough gear to work with if you are doing more than an hour or two.