Non Disclosure Agreements

Does anyone have any experience with NDAs in Femdom/sexwork?

Id be interested to hear about it.

How have they worked? Go to attorney? Find a template? Pros/Cons?

Im involved in an ongoing relationship with a dominatrix where an NDA could be helpful for both parties to maintain some boundaries and wanted to see if others have had success. There is probably more benefit to me than the Domme but i do believe it could be mutually beneficial to help maintain and foster the relationship.

Interested to see if anyone has experienced this, but in My opionion... If you don't trust your Domme enough to keep your personal info private without a signed form, then you shouldn't be seeing them!

Is it really legally binding when you are using a pseudonym? My subs rarely use their real name when booking a session... And I don't like them to know Mine either!

I believe playing together is a contract in itself. Both parties have to agree to trust the other not to take advantage of any private info. Most Dommes take the risk of being "outed" just as much as their subs, but We also run the risk of being stalked when private information becomes available.

So Spark, Besides being afraid of being "outed" to your job, spouse, etc is there another reason I'm missing to sign an NDA?

Good questions

No i generally don't worry about being outed. I am in a long term relationship that is aware of my relationship with my femdom. so I have consent there. The person i am in a relationship with may feel better with an NDA in my place

The relationship goes far behind normal money for sessions and includes joint bank accounts, credit cards, auto notes etc. we dont use pseudonyms we have real names including addresses etc and have visited each others homes. There is a high level of trust.

While i dont feel comfortable posting specific dollar amounts they are large and will likely get larger. Despite everyones good intentions people do strange things when money is involved. Especially at this dollar amount. Much like we put wills, prenups, trusts, etc in place to protect ourselves in real life relationships An NDA may be one option to continue the relationship but make all parties feel comfortable with some level of protection.

I have implicitly signed a NDA.

It is called The Official Secrets Act!

TM

I've never been asked for my real name. For someone who is a public figure or celebrity, it makes sense. For a schmuck like me, I don't see it as being necessary. If asked, I would sign one for a Mistress. But, if we weren't both willing to use our legal names, I'm not sure it would hold in court.

In definitely not a public figure or celebrity.

And if this was simply session time i wouldnt worry about this.

But since we each have full personal details i think there is some concern that just like in any real world relationship with finances involved rather she ends it or i end it having some level of legal protection to keep the other party from disclosing in an emotional or painful moment could be helpful. It seems to be me to be a reasonable way to handle a very complex financial beneficial domme/sub relationship

Your recourse if an NDA is violated is to take the case to court, where it would become very pubic if a publicity seeking person or entity got interested.

Correct. But an NDA could be a deterrent enough to keep either party from makong an emotional decision in a moment of anger

Sort of along the lines of a beware of dog sign may be a better security system than the dog itself.

I would be concerned if the Domme is not on board with the idea before you broach it, the relationship will be permanently damaged once you proceed.

In the context of pro domination the arguments presented by Mistress UV are sound.

However it seems that you have fallen into the Twilight Zone which lies between pro and lifestyle Femdom. I have been there as well. So I am not going to arbitrarily dismiss the idea of a NDA in your situation. However you really need to discuss this with an attorney you trust and bluntly explain your concerns to him.

I've spoken with Dommes about NDAs in the past when they have demanded personal information prior to meeting me (this is a hard limit for me and if it is a requirement, I just walk away).

In those discussions they have always brought up their willingness to sign one & it has always been about trying to make me feel better about turning over that information. Usually they have a template already because they "have done it before". To me that is pointless as trying to enforce & collect any remedy for violating the NDA would probably be worse than the disclosure itself.

Maybe look at some tyoe of written agreement or contract that lays out the commitments & responsibilities of both parties in the financial relationship rather than an NDA (which is only about disclosing certain information). It is still a written agreement between the two people that can have impact in a court case even if the idea of a "slave contract" itself isn't.

When I first read your post I thought it was a prank, but I was wrong. The reason I was confused is because you are not talking about an NDA, probably disclosure is your least worry, but about a contract.

I was in situations where I considered a contract too, and doing it could be a very good idea, not as much for reasons of enforcement against each other but for making the rules clear, and protecting them against the rest of the world.

It should not be difficult to find a good contract lawyer, from a legal point of view the BDSM part is not relevant.