Alpha/beta and submission

There has been a trend where submissive men are described as betas and dominant males are described as Alphas. Alphas are often portrayed as strong and muscular. I get it in the context of fantasy of cuck play. But I also thought it was a strange distinction to break men into two categories based upon their interest in submission.

To me the stereotype of a traditional alpha male comes off as self center and egotistical.

I don’t really like either term but to me a man who focuses on a womans needs first, treats her with respect, makes her life better, helps to provide for her financially, emotionally, and physically would be an aloha male and that seems to describe quite a few submissive men

I think you have to consider things in the wild. Of two men, which one is going to survive better with limited resources like food and water and the threat of predators? Which one is more likely to be willing to eat his neighbors if it came to that? Yeah, someone who earns more money is better off and has the provider status, but that may not necessarily be who a woman wants to be with or have a sexual relationship with. If a man is successful financially and is someone who would be willing to eat his neighbors if it came to that and his familiy starving, then you have a complete package right there.

If the zombie apocalypse is coming i agree with you. But to me its more like which one is going to send her kids to private school. Give her security safety and peace of mind and treat her with respect and like a queen. I think many submissive men fit that mold. I know i do.

Mistress Ayn started a thread on this topic several years ago.

http://domina.ms/~domroot/thebuzz/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1261#Post1261

Thanks for sharing that thread. the introvert discussion was a good read.

Not sure what it means but in real life but i am the classic definition of an ambivert. That holds true in sessions as well. I am either extremely extroverted or stone cold quiet. I almost cant control which side of me will show up. My Domme is a definite extrovert. With that being said i enjoy my extroverted sessions more. Things get wild when neither one of us will shut up. (Although she can make me. But thats a whole other story).

Glad you liked. I have heard of ambiverts. While they do fluctuate to some degree I never heard of one doing it to the degree you described. Do you find yourself more focused on the Alpha/Beta dynamic when you are in your extrovert moods?

Hi Thomas,

Thanks for the question

Ive never noticed a difference between my introvert and extrovert sides when it cones to being an alpha or a beta. I dont view myself as either one rather in session or real life. My session personality and real life personality are the same. I also don't view my domme as an alpha. There is a lot of fantasy around subs being inferior and dommes being superior. I get the kink around it but I don't really get into that to that as well. Yes she takes control during most sex but outside of that we support each other. I like to submit because its enjoyable, creative and exciting but im not trying to slip the bonds of a real world alpha role and move into a beta role. Probably a tougher dynamic to achieve in a professional session

Im Just a guy who likes to get beat up and submit during sex. Im very confident in my submission. But Ive struggled with the whole concept of submission being a sign of weakness, as well alpha/beta, inferior/superior dynamics for a while. When ive explained this to other women including pro dommes i normally get the “your a beta response.” but im happy that i found someone who understands me. Interestingly ive had good success playing this dynamic with escorts.

Your question prompted me to text my domme and ask her what she thought i was. She said Alpha with a huge masochistic streak. I could see the masochistic part. Which probably comes out more when i am extroverted and makes it easier on her to hurt me. She was probably trying to boost my ego as well. Mission accomplished there.

Interesting and very thoughtful response. Spark. Shows that you did a thorough and candid self-analysis.

Mistress Ayn is fascinated by the Alpha/Beta dynamic. She has been unusually inactive of late. Perhaps she is enjoying a well deserved vacation. When she becomes active again she might want to join in this conversation.

I have often described myself on this forum as being 60% masochist 40% submissive. I suspect that you are somewhat similar.