Can somebody please let me know...

Why on Earth someone would write a one line email, or a series of terse emails that leave out pertinent information about their interests and experience...? The more I know about you, the better your experience will be.

So... what's the fucking problem?

Asking for a friend


xoxo.

Sorry I can’t help you. Imo the tendency is the opposite in that we want to write a novel to convey every kink and interest and background. At least that’s the case with me. My guess is it’s not uncommon for some subs to blizzard a Domme with emails prior to a session.

Stupidity? Inexperience? Trying to top from the bottom? The sub gets turned on by all the back and forth? Who knows?

It's been a while since I've seen someone new but I always tried to do research online, the Mistress' website, reviews and social media. If I think we'd be compatible I'll email and give a brief outline of who I am, my experience briefly describe the role play and my favorite activities. (No I'm not a "script" guy for role play.) I'll ask if I don't know the tribute and location, and possible dates for play. That's it. If the Mistress has questions then I follow up.

As long as something is well written and not a script, I am happy to read it. I would much rather an enthusiastic rambling email than one line. It is probably due to lack of experience mixed with a bit of fear, but logic would still dictate that the more information you give a Domme the better, no? It is exasperating.

Inexperience and a little stupidity I think is a keen insight.

If I am going to spend $300 on an experience, I'm going to make sure that I communicate all I need to on my end to make it memorable.

Unfortunately shame probably plays a role, compounded with an inability to convey one's emotions. Maybe subs should keep a diary instead of relying on us to drag their proclivities out of them.

ARGH


xoxo.

I'm the same as you, but I know some dommes really hate long emails. Sometimes I think it's just a misplaced attempt to be polite and not top from the bottom.

Other times they're bad at explaining what they want, don't really know what they want, or are afraid of having written proof of their kinks. Often I find they're a lot more expressive in person, which helps -- but I still prefer being able to think about the session ahead of time and plan it out a little.

And then there's the irritating minority who expect us to be mind readers and get very annoyed when we're not actually psychic. Fortunately that seems to be a small group.

I think it is most likely inexperience compounded by some Domme sites that expressly tell prospective clients to keep their emails very brief. The inexperience makes it difficult for them to succinctly provide the kind of information and feedback you prefer and their fear of angering the Domme intimidates them from writing longer emails that might provide you with the info you want.

Hopefully over time we all learn to simply and clearly communicate our desires and needs in a session because that's where great session experiences begin.

Hard cocks, less blood in the wrong head.

HA! In picking the the wrong Domina over the years, a very rare occurrence, I’ve often said to myself, “ I was thinking with the wrong head.”

In summary, this. lol!

In regards to single line emails, it is uncomfortable to write more on phones and that seems to be the dominant way many people use the Internet these days.

It is an old lament that people forget that there human beings on the other side of the text on the Internet.

My theory is that phones make that worse.

People now have this little box that they can type stray thoughts into, like a confessional in their pocket or an emotional spittoon.

This is probably even more true now that you have a generation of adults who have grown up communicating via text messages.

That is the foundation. On top of that add that guy's conflicting interests and fears of visiting a professional dominatrix and you get the annoying cryptic messages you have been getting.

Haha. Thanks, UV for getting on point.

I think part of it can be inexperience and not knowing what they want specifically (That was me at one point though for me that materialized in form of asking for EVERYTHING I had an inkling I wanted to experience) and fear of topping from the bottom (Also me at one point).

Guilty as charged, I'm in the over-sharing camp

I recently saw someone for the second time. Prior to the session starting she went over a few things with me telling me she had gone back and read all my emails again. I was impressed. Both sessions with her have been excellent as well.

As Polonius said in "Hamlet", "Brevity is the soul of wit."

It's the same reason people ask "Does anyone have any information on Mistress X?" without providing her link, city, state, planet, galaxy, or the personal interests with which they hope Mistress X, on whichever planet, is simpatico.

They're typing with one hand. They other hand is furiously occupied. When it's no longer occupied, they lose interest. So it doesn't resolve well afterward...

LOL! Brilliant... and so true.

I'd rather scan through something and deal with an overshare than to have one liners- by far. One-liners almost always need a session that night or end up being no-shows or just assholes.

Actually writing something is an indication that they are detail-oriented and usually err on the respectful side (except when you get a script).

They are usually not cryptic, but incredibly straight-forward, which is read by me (the receiver) as extremely one-off and rude. You're expecting me to provide an experience for you, with hardly any information?

Also, it smacks of emailing ten people in one night. Because let's face it, not everyone knows how to copy and paste.

That's what should happen!

At the very least, the Domme should be thinking about how to push boundaries and in what direction to do so, based on your previous session.

Good for you.

I think you are giving them too much credit.

HA! With the lack of proper grammar or spelling with most of them, I think this is the real issue.

Mme Veronica we met when you first appeared on the scene in ??? a decade or more ago at the ??? dungeon in the West 20s that closed suddenly. We did a role play scene, no need to recount it here, but for some reason we didn't match up. I did like you and I'm glad you're still in the scene educating lucky subs. Best to you!

Oh, you must have come to see me when I was first starting at The Hidden Chamber. I was there 2006 to 2008, when I went independent. Good memory on you!

It's good to hear from someone who's actually seen me in the flesh, most of my clients lurk here but don't tend to post.

xoxo.

To refresh your memory, "You Amazon Queen, Me Tarzan." You are tall and strong and I'm tall... and was strong then. (Now? Tall and mature.) It was role play, some type of non-competitive wrestling if I recall, light spanking, Tarzan being subjugated as entertainment. As I wrote before, glad you are still around. GRRRRRRR!

Ha ha, sounds hilarious! I was feeling out at that time what I enjoyed and what I didn't, and wrestling has never been one of my favorites. Karate and boxing- yes-- wrestling not so much.

Thanks for being my guinea pig

Glad to have been of service. LOL!

<3

When I saw the first sentence I wondered what the hell? - until you got to the second part. I hope you don't get too many clients who cannot cut and paste. My guess about the original question is probably newbies uncomfortable with describing their interests to a stranger.