Fantasy vs Reality

I have a prospective client asking about a smother session with my box. He has "seen some videos" and believes that one can pass out from facesitting in a smother box.

In my experience working with clip producers who specialize in this category, that's not how it works lol. There is a large dose of "movie magic" in porn, which for some reason the layperson doesn't realize is theatrical exaggeration. One top-selling friend pretends to pass out fairly regularly in the same model box, as people seem to like this, clearly. I did see footage of him actually passing out from a scissorhold, but not from facesitting.

It sometimes feels tenuous pulling someone back to check their expectations based on fantasy. When I get requests like this, I assume they have not really thought through what they are asking for and don't expect a booking. It feels along the same lines as guys who message asking for castration at my home dungeon. I don't know if this is jaded admin talk or if I forget just how skewed my perspective is from working in the industry.

Just in case I'm wrong...has anyone actually passed out/made someone pass out from facesitting for real? People see blockbuster movies and don't think they are real, feels dangerous how porn doesn't get the same consideration.

I've played solo breath control sessions for years (suffocation only, no ligatures around the neck and nothing restrictive that I couldn't easily get out of) and for years I've fantasized about being restrained and someone taking me all the way to the point of passing out ... but in reality I don't know if I could tolerate it or not because the body's natural survival instinct would eventually kick in and I can't help but wonder if at that point the fantasy would stop being "fun".
There's probably quite a few people that fantasize about being suffocated to the point of blacking out, but the reality is how many would actually "enjoy" it once the panic mode sets in?

I can definitely see how someone would think it's possible. I remember I used to have an even more major interest in breath play, and I thought it was totally possible to pass out from facesitting so I would keep trying to hold my breath until I passed out and realized I just couldn't do it and it was way to dangerous to push forward.

I'm sure it's possible but I imagine it's way too dangerous. Even despite my skepticism about it, I've seen fairly convincing videos (ESQ smotherqueenz comes to mind) that make me think it's possible, but even if it's possible I feel like messing around with actual ass(heh)phyxia is too dangerous to do even once, let alone increase the odds of something going wrong by making it a regular thing.
But i'm obviously no expert, just wanted to put my two cents in. I'm interested to see the other replies to this thread.

Very few, but that alone doesn't make it a bad thing IMO.
I never "enjoy" impact play while it's happening, especially a very intense session of corporal since pain is pain, but most times I do enjoy that I got to experience that pain for a mistress.

There is a Mistress in Connecticut named Mistress Nemesis, and I've heard that she does simulated hangings. But I'm wondering how far she takes that fantasy.

Good point...

On female bodybuilder wrestling sites I have visited the subject of the sub "passing out" from the domina/Amazon scissoring has been a subject off and on for a few years. More than a few guys describe in detail the experience. I think it is way too unsafe and holds no appeal for me. But again, to each his or her own.

My answer is not relevant to facesitting because I have never come close to losing consciousness in that way, but I have been knocked out from a chokehold by a Domme. I allowed it to happen (it wasn't part of a session or even concensual, but I could have easily flipped her to get out of it) and I never panicked (although it was also much quicker than facesitting suffocation would be).

And I think the fact that you didn’t fight it and accepted it and allowed it to happen possibly played a part in that. I mean, I’ve never been taken to the point of blacking out so whether or not I would actually experience a sense of panic is unknown to me... I was mainly just speaking from the point of the body’s natural survival instinct .... but if it’s something that i embrace, something that I want to experience .... would that negate any feelings of panic?? I dunno’ .....

I’ve been put out from a chokehold but not from smothering although I have been smothered. In my experience being put out from a chokehold is like being put to sleep as the pressure on the carotid? artery increases. Kind of like when you are put out from anaesthesia. Very peaceful. This is as opposed to being smothered as you can feel your air shut off and you are unable to take a breath which induced panic.

I was a regular of a Domme who would facesit and smother me. When I panicked she would repeatedly whack my hands as if to tell me to no be still. It was hard but I learned to relax and let go and trust her. She always stopped short of making me pass out.

Hello MAV. Domina M started a discussion in her forum about protecting clients from themselves. That particular thread was about videos that show sounding with a shoe heel, but it lead to discussion of other things that you might find interesting.

I enjoy breath play using masks and face sitting but would never take someone to the point of passing out because there is the real possibility they won't start breathing again. As you stated, it's not like a choke hold.

It's a buzzkill but I usually send folks a link similar to this one so they can educate themselves - because as you know, a lot of guys just want to go back and forth with you via email about it and get their kicks that way.

https://www.healthline.com/health/healthy-sex/erotic-asphyxiation#types-and-risks

Thanks for the referral! I shall check out that thread.

You are absolutely right about the constant emails. Leaning into being a buzzkill might be just the thing lol! Funny how our job is a mix of holding both fantasy and reality, sometimes in conjunction and sometimes to either extreme...

That is exactly the appeal for many people, it seems.

And here is an email that came in today that should make everyone chuckle . . . obviously it one of the ones that don't deserve a reply.

Hello Mistress Ayn

Would you be up to making a bet with me that I have to visit you for a session and I am not allowed to have an orgasm and if I do get one then I get hit with a baseball bat 10 times hard in the groin while having the orgasm and immediately after get locked up in chastity permanently for life meaning my last orgasm in my life was a very painful one and with a monthly penalty fee of $1000 for life for keeping me locked up.

All written in a contract so it's official and no way out for me if I fail and with the appropriate payment obligations for me to you.

Greetings
Nick

Wow, i'm surprised he could write so grammatically correct while doing the ol' one hand type technique!

I’m going to quote Thanos here. “Reality is offen more disappointing” Thano

And somehow men convinced the world they are the "superior" sex.

LOL!

I literally JUST opened the exact same email >_<

That answers your question, AspX: no typing required when it's cut and paste!

The greatest con there ever was...

Wow .... that one almost makes me want to apologize for him!

Lmao but I can’t believe this is a serious inquiry. That’s nuts. How often do you get stuff like this?

It depends - sometimes I think the full moon brings them out and you will get a rash of them. For me it's usually 3-4 times a month. Mostly it's about castration or crushing the balls until they rupture - that sort of extreme stuff.

As Miss Vonn mentioned above, many times it's cut and paste. They are sending the same email to multiple Dommes hoping to engage for free.

Crazy but you’ve got it : Hoping to engage for free. I guess it’s one of the pitas of Pro Domming. Laugh and delete is the best course of action.

’ll admit it. Generally I think men are much more prone then women to doing stupid stuff and acting the fool. Hormones? Different brain wiring? I don’t know.

I have a very specific session that I've had several times. Of course it's not going the full route as that would be too real. It's an executrix scene involving suffocation. I know full well it can't be real as it's so extreme. But the fantasy around the scene (flirtation/binding/bagging) is so very hot.

Some of it I'm sure is inexperience and not really knowing what they want or how to ask for it and deal with it. But my understanding of my fantasy is keen perhaps because real would be so extreme? Maybe? Some of the lesser scenes might not be so easily understandable in that full context.