1st Time Question

Hello,

For subs: What was it like your first time playing with a professional? How did you feel afterwards?

For Dommes: What is it like playing with clients when it is their first time ever?

Thanks

Something I can answer, since it is so recent - within the last month. What was it like... terrifying, exciting, scary, sensual, intense, erotic, and oddly therapeutic. I would advise you spend time researching and find a Domme you think you will be compatible with. This was something I wanted to do for so very long. I was a little concerned the reality could not/ would not live up to the fantasy. The "problem" is the reality was better than my fantasy. Which leads into how I felt afterwards. I felt elated and I was left wanting more. The only regret I have is that I didn't do this sooner.

Good Question Hoody1. I always enjoy being a subs first. I'm not a fan of breaking former Mistress induced bad habits.

I really hate hearing Mistress X does this, and Mistress Y allows me to do that. So many Dommes these days are service tops, that subs come to expect being catered to.

My 1st time ( only some years ago ) wasn't that great. It was ok, i had to much limits, didn't know what to expect etc. But it was like breaking a barrier for a first time for something i was fantasising for 'decades'. A few weeks later, i sessioned again (with the same Lady), lifted some limits - and it blew my mind. Now, i am hooked...


+1

Really understand what you want, the specific activities and your limits, hard and soft. You will get so much more out of the session if you can communicate your interests. Don't expect the domme to know. There are hundreds of activities. It's okay to start with a few and grow.

On the other side, do not script your session. This is where we know better. Give your domina what you want to try and then be open for the exciting roller coaster--let yourself go to the experience.

I scratched my itch for spanking by attending and playing at some public (and inexpensive) gatherings but I resisted seeking out a professional for a few reasons. First was the cost, second was that, at the time (the mid-1980s), the means for finding resources and making contact were a bit seedy, and finally, I was (and still am) interested in spanking only, and from the ads, I didn't really see what I was looking for.

Not too long before a trip to the San Francisco Bay area, I read about Fantasy Makers on the Internet, and the way they promoted their facility and goal of fulfilling a fantasy, this sounded like a reasonably safe bet. I made a phone call, had a fairly lengthy conversation with the "housemother" about the spanker and spanking of my dreams, and she suggested that Phoenix would be a perfect match. After reviewing Phoenix' profile on the web site, I set up an appointment.

On The Day, I had some butterflies in my stomach, but I felt welcome, and after meeting Phoenix and discussing my hopes, likes, and dislikes, she went off to get dressed, and came back the girl of my dreams. We went upstairs to a non-threatening parlor setting and she went to work. It was a total success. While I'd had a few spankings prior to this one, this was the first time that all the pieces were put together.

So, communication was the key here, as you'll hear a lot. Don't be afraid to open up to a pro - they've heard it all. And don't be afraid to accept that someone you picked, after some discussion, might not be right for you. The trick is to figure that out before you nail down the session.

Learn things, don't assume too much, and good luck on your quest.

It was ok as I was very young and nervous at the time. She was a big name Domme and very experienced as well. Once I got there and she strapped me down I knew there was no turning back at that point. I actually started shaking and she ask me are you ok? I told her I’ve seen some of your videos and know how you play. She laughed and said those were subs that she knows well she does that with. She actually did almost a little bit of everything just lightly. I felt so much better afterwards, wish I’d have seen her again but she moved to another country later.

I see a lot of first timers and they're all over the place. Most of the things that go wrong happen before they ever set foot in the dungeon. Once they're in session they're pretty normal, except a bit less sure of what they're into. It can be charmingly easy to blow their minds, which I enjoy.

My first session was with the legendary Ava Taurel. Although I didn't realize it at the time, she was already a legend in the ProDomme world.

The session was amazing, although now I realize that she was actually very gentle with me. She did some light bondage, NT and light CBT. I felt very satisfied, calm and content afterwards. She was fantastic.

Afterwards, she asked me if this had really been my first session. When I assured her it was indeed my first time, she told me that I was born for this. These many years later, I hope I have proven worthy of her confidence in me.

My first time sessioning with a professional domme was with Eve Minax in San Francisco. She was kind, creative, and wonderful.

After the session I felt super happy to have had a chance to explore a bunch of areas I had only dreamed of for so long.

"Basking in the glow" is a good way to describe how I felt.

That is a lot to ask for somebody coming to a first session. When I did that I tried to find out what activities I would like. At the second session I tried to find what were my limits. But that was a long time ago and maybe today newbies have more information available before they start.

For the most part, I enjoy playing with novices. It's so easy to blow their mind. On the other hand, they often need to be educated in Domme etiquette. Many don't "get" that just because they are excited doesn't mean they should send dozens of emails. These days they also think what they see in BDSM porn is what a session is like. Often it's the job of their first Mistress to provide this education, which is not always fun, but necessary.

Do you think it is a lot to ask? I really do need to know. The preperations and mood are really different if somebody wants humiliation than a heavy bondage or corporal. Completely different scenes and I am supposed to guess? Also, if someone is seeking body worship and more vanilla activities, they are not suited for me and better off with a traditional escort--less expensive, too!

My first time was Mistress Alicia in NYC. To this day, she is the most awesome Mistress I know . I was very nervous and she was very understanding . We still keep in touch to this day.

Mistress Alicia is one of the greats. I've had two sessions with her, and both were mind-blowing.