Posted by: second try
Crossing the great divide - 06/27/19 02:03 AM
I have been a sub slut for more than 30 years. When I first started with bdsm, a typical session for me was a little bondage and discipline and then supervised masturbation, sometimes accompanied by words from the Mistress intended to be either inspiring or humiliating, I was never sure.
But, then I had an extramarital girl friend who also played bdsm games, and Her word choices often centered around forcedbi. One day, She asked me if I would be willing to be the stunt for a scene She was going to do with a slut who she wanted to force. Reluctantly, I agreed to play that role. When it was over, She asked me if I liked it. I truthfully said "no" and She told me not to worry about it, almost every guy who She used as a "top" in those kinds of sessions ultimately finds himself to be a good "bottom."
I thought She was crazy. I was wrong. I have since had many years in and around the scene as a beta subject in forcedbi events including at CFNM events. As a retired adult, I took a long hiatus from sessioning thinking that I have had enough. It turns out that I haven't had enough and recently have been more actively seeking sessions in NY and elsewhere on business travels.
I have met one Domme who, on learning that I have been used orally for all these many years, said that if I session with Her all boundaries would be crossed. She told me that I would be seriously pegged as a start, and that soon after She proved to Herself my inclinations to take it down there, She would be making me cross the great divide and become a "real" forcedbi subject. I know She really means it and is not just talking. In our practice sessions, She had made me begin with a full red bag enema to make sure that I would be open for the treatment. She has also told me that I will have to take it from several subjects, one is never enough for an "old timer" getting his cherry popped.
She is conscious, or says She is, about the health risks. She explains the precautions She takes. Mentally and emotionally I feel ready. Physically, I doubt myself, and psychologically, it still remains a huge step. Should I or should I back away?
If I stick with this Domme, I will soon likely have no choice. She is twice divorced (hubbie # 2 was Her first complete anal slut), in Her young 50s, and has been in the scene 20 years, both Lifestyle and part time Pro. She only recently decided to spend more time as a Pro, though She does not have a website and does not advertise.
Even if I do not stick with Her, I now imagine myself on the same road with others. I am openly considering it.
But, then I had an extramarital girl friend who also played bdsm games, and Her word choices often centered around forcedbi. One day, She asked me if I would be willing to be the stunt for a scene She was going to do with a slut who she wanted to force. Reluctantly, I agreed to play that role. When it was over, She asked me if I liked it. I truthfully said "no" and She told me not to worry about it, almost every guy who She used as a "top" in those kinds of sessions ultimately finds himself to be a good "bottom."
I thought She was crazy. I was wrong. I have since had many years in and around the scene as a beta subject in forcedbi events including at CFNM events. As a retired adult, I took a long hiatus from sessioning thinking that I have had enough. It turns out that I haven't had enough and recently have been more actively seeking sessions in NY and elsewhere on business travels.
I have met one Domme who, on learning that I have been used orally for all these many years, said that if I session with Her all boundaries would be crossed. She told me that I would be seriously pegged as a start, and that soon after She proved to Herself my inclinations to take it down there, She would be making me cross the great divide and become a "real" forcedbi subject. I know She really means it and is not just talking. In our practice sessions, She had made me begin with a full red bag enema to make sure that I would be open for the treatment. She has also told me that I will have to take it from several subjects, one is never enough for an "old timer" getting his cherry popped.
She is conscious, or says She is, about the health risks. She explains the precautions She takes. Mentally and emotionally I feel ready. Physically, I doubt myself, and psychologically, it still remains a huge step. Should I or should I back away?
If I stick with this Domme, I will soon likely have no choice. She is twice divorced (hubbie # 2 was Her first complete anal slut), in Her young 50s, and has been in the scene 20 years, both Lifestyle and part time Pro. She only recently decided to spend more time as a Pro, though She does not have a website and does not advertise.
Even if I do not stick with Her, I now imagine myself on the same road with others. I am openly considering it.