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#1502 - 06/20/16 01:47 PM
Consensual Non-consent: Giving Up Safewords
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Occasional
Registered: 10/19/15
Posts: 38
Loc: Southern U.S.
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It was over a decade ago: I was sessioning with a new Mistress "outside the perimeter" in Atlanta. After a very informal and cordial "get acquainted" chat, she gave me my initial instructions to disrobe and move into the play area.
She dutifully restrained my wrists to the St Andrew's cross and prepared for an initial round of corporal punishment. Then it occurred to me: she never gave me a safe word.
And you know what? It felt exhilarating! Here I was restrained, unable to stop what was happening, and giving myself completely to a Dominant woman.
The session was wonderful, and the Mistress and I exchanged our thoughts afterward in follow-up emails. I casually mentioned that we never got around to discussing safe words ahead of the session, and she replied that it was a simple oversight and that she uses the standard "Red=stop" system.
Over the years, I will sometimes broach the possibility of relinquishing a safe word with a Mistress that I've served in multiple sessions. It enhances the feeling of surrender and trust, the two qualities that make a D/s relationship so fulfilling and powerful.
What do the rest of you think? While always acknowledging that "safe, sane and consensual" is non-negotiable, can a D/s relationship develop to the point that a sub can "let go of the rope" a little?
I'm curious to see the opinions of both Mistresses and other submissives.
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