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#12974 - 01/21/21 05:47 PM What Does it Mean to be Broken?
Cheyenne Online   content

Pooh-Bah

Registered: 07/12/19
Posts: 2271
What is your idea of what a slave being broken? Have you experienced this on either side?

In my experiences, this is an unexpected emotional release. Sometimes, it has happened during playtime and others afterwards. I was spanking a young woman at a play party and, as I was comforting her afterwards, the tears started streaming. It was an absolute cathartic release for her. It was a surprise to both of us. Other times, it has been in the middle of a corporal session, to the point that I stopped the scene and gave "Aftercare," in the middle of the scene, only to return to play.

I'm sure it is different for everyone. I'd love to hear about different experiences.

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#12975 - 01/21/21 07:36 PM Re: What Does it Mean to be Broken? [Re: Cheyenne]
The Thomas Online   content
Addict

Registered: 10/20/15
Posts: 432
This topic came up about 2 months ago in this thread

http://domina.ms/~domroot/thebuzz/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=12432#Post12432

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#12977 - 01/21/21 09:51 PM Re: What Does it Mean to be Broken? [Re: Cheyenne]
ztrade Online   content
Enthusiast

Registered: 10/26/15
Posts: 326
Wow! Several years ago a domme who was posting at maxfisch brought up this very topic and how she loved having her subs broken, but, from her point of view, in a good way!

I created a thread and it seems that neither several dommes nor several subs would give consistent meanings to being broken and whether or not it is good!

I think that one basic meaning or def is that the sub or slave is in enough pain, or torment of some type whether physical or emotional, that he gives up several limits or ideas or emotional self-controls he had had.

Some dommes aim to have this happen to some subs and in other cases, they say, it happens spontaneously.

The other question is what to think of breaking a sub, knowing or believing that in most cases, he will return, broken or not! Apparently some dommes enjoy toying with some subs who have been broken!

Below is the link to a book or a movie with the title Unbroken about a prisoner of war!

https://www.amazon.com/Unbroken-Jack-OCo...7344&sr=8-1

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#12978 - 01/21/21 09:53 PM Re: What Does it Mean to be Broken? [Re: Cheyenne]
buffalo Online   content
Enthusiast

Registered: 06/21/19
Posts: 320
Loc: USA
This is something I’ve wanted to happen for years and years but it never has. For me it means being broken to tears and having this huge emotional release similar to your sub at the play party but hand in hand with that it’s also a surrender to the Domme who brings this out of me. I am not an emotional person by nature and I just cannot seem to get to this point in session. I want to get there but it’s not something I can force. In my fantasies i think of different scenarios where it happens but you can’t script it and in reality it never seems to play out the way I hope and fantasise it will.

I’ve been seeing someone regularly and we have talked about this. She wants this to happen and she’s confident it will. But she says I’m a tough nut to crack. I don’t fight it but I can’t force it. It doesn’t have to come through corporal necessarily but I think pain is going to have to be part of it. I trust her so I’ve let her go further with marks then ever before but my situation does not allow for me to be beaten bloody so there’s only so much I can do as far as corporal goes. I do think breaking will happen but I’m not sure what it will take. Meanwhile the sessions are great so I will keep trying.
_________________________
And still trying to figure it all out.................. buffalo

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#12984 - 01/22/21 02:40 AM Re: What Does it Mean to be Broken? [Re: The Thomas]
Cheyenne Online   content

Pooh-Bah

Registered: 07/12/19
Posts: 2271
Thanks, Thomas. I read through it. Bummer that I missed it.

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#12985 - 01/22/21 02:54 AM Re: What Does it Mean to be Broken? [Re: ztrade]
Cheyenne Online   content

Pooh-Bah

Registered: 07/12/19
Posts: 2271
Thanks for the Amazon link. It looks like a good watch. I was having the discussion of what it means to be broken with a friend just prior to making the original post. I compared it to spending time in the remote area of Costa Rica. There gets to be a point, especially in rainy season, where you have to realize that you have no control and must simply surrender to the environment. It hit me when I was on my quad, a good hour from where I was staying (and, it starting down pouring rain. Earlier that day it had been quite hot with almost oppressive sunshine. I'd also gotten lost. There are no street signs and mostly dirt roads. Something inside of me changed. No stress. No worries. Just complete acceptance and a liberating feeling of not worrying any more. There is no choice but to just go with the flow. Fighting the situation around me wouldn't have helped. Oddly enough, shivering in the rain, not certain if I'd make it back or have to sleep on my quad gave me a sense of euphoria. I've had similar experiences working out. In a smaller way, I've experienced a similar feeling when my personal trainer pushes me in a physical work out. It isn't close to what the Amazon trailer shows in intensity, but along the same lines.

When I watched my play partners "Break," it was moving. I hadn't planned it. The emotion was so heavy you could feel it it in the room. I can't say that either of them stayed "Broken" or that it had changed their life. But, it was an experience that the one I am still in touch with talk about from time to time. It was really something else.

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#12986 - 01/22/21 02:56 AM Re: What Does it Mean to be Broken? [Re: buffalo]
Cheyenne Online   content

Pooh-Bah

Registered: 07/12/19
Posts: 2271
It is intriguing that your domme is familiar with this and is setting out for it to happen. I will be very interested to hear how this goes. As pragmatic as you are, my guess is that it when it does, it will be an epic emotional release.

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#12990 - 01/22/21 07:02 AM Re: What Does it Mean to be Broken? [Re: Cheyenne]
ScoobyBelfast Online   content
Enthusiast

Registered: 12/12/20
Posts: 288
My girlfriend has brought me to tears twice. It wasn't that anything hurt a lot. It is hard to explain what took me that certain mind space. I didn't think of it as being being broken at the time. It was more like a purging of emotion. Afterwards I was on cloud nine for a few days.

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#13003 - 01/22/21 05:24 PM Re: What Does it Mean to be Broken? [Re: Cheyenne]
tabula Online   content
Artisan

Registered: 06/15/19
Posts: 70
Loc: New York
I'm going to give a different opinion. I'm talking from the point of view of a masochist.

I don't think crying in a session equates to being broken, but it's probably a signpost on the path. I've been brought to tears from pain in several sessions. To me it's beautiful to get to a place where tears are rolling down my face, but I'm still be able to look into a Domme's eyes, thank her and ask for more. Tears can be a normal part of processing a scene. The word broken suggests something is wrong, we've passed out of the realm of logical response. At the beginning of a torturous session I can take the pain in stride. Evidence of pain is minimal and I may encourage or patiently wait for a Domme to increase the intensity. Then we get to the point where my distress is obvious. I'm making sounds, I'm writhing and pulling at bonds, I may start to beg. A lot of this is unconscious. I don't decide to pull at my bonds, I struggle to stop myself from doing it. Then we hit tears, crying is truly crossing a barrier into new territory, but it's not the same as broken. It's just another subconscious form of resistance, appealing to a Domme's empathy. Broken is still quite a bit further down the road. It comes when the acceptance of true futility sets in to the subconscious. Crying stops, begging stops, writhing stops and your subconscious just gives up and accepts that there is nothing to do but absorb the pain. To be clear, this is not akin to passing out, the person is still conscious, but their unconscious defenses have shut down. I think this type of broken is really dark and probably quite eerie to witness. Perhaps one day, I'll get to experience it. But for right now, it's not a goal of mine.


Edited by tabula (01/22/21 05:25 PM)
Edit Reason: grammar

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#13010 - 01/23/21 12:46 AM Re: What Does it Mean to be Broken? [Re: Cheyenne]
buffalo Online   content
Enthusiast

Registered: 06/21/19
Posts: 320
Loc: USA
An epic emotional release. Reading that I honestly don’t think I’ve ever had that. I’m not without emotion but I’m generally on an even keel. It’s a pretty ingrained part of my personality not to show emotion and keep things under wraps. I think that’s one reason I like sessioning. It allows me to show myself in a way that no one else sees. Even if I’m not having this big emotional release a session is a primal experience where I’m living out and showing a part of myself that is always hidden.

I am getting off topic here but it strikes me this last part especially is pretty common and for the Dommes it must be a heady if not heavy experience in a lot of cases. I’d think that as with other professions involving emotional interactions with people there’s got to be coping mechanisms to help deal with some of the intensity and emotion that go with doing this for a living. But I don’t know.
_________________________
And still trying to figure it all out.................. buffalo

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