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#8934 - 12/28/19 03:32 AM
Re: Negative Review
[Re: 87pegged]
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Pooh-Bah
Registered: 07/12/19
Posts: 2310
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You can purchase dungeon furniture from Amazon?! Things are different these days. I feel fortunate to have enjoyed my Dom livelihood in the late 90's/early 2000's. I hope you find someone that connects with you. Life is too short not to have fun playtime now and, again. :-)
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#8935 - 12/28/19 05:58 AM
Re: Negative Review
[Re: Cheyenne]
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Enthusiast
Registered: 06/17/19
Posts: 285
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Yes, lack of communication is the best way to ruin a session. It is funny that how much things change, over generations, how much they stay the same. About 3% of the clients and, video slaves I came across over the years had a similar "Read my mind. Be a slave to my fetish attitude." When they didn't get what they wanted, they were angry. And, when they did get what they wanted, they were back again, like a drug addict, upset if they didn't get the same "High" they did last time. These type of folks have the maturity of a 2 year old of a two year old who dropped their lollypop in the sandbox.
On the flip side, this reminds me of a long time client, who is one of my best friends, to this day. The first time he came to see me, I thought it was a great session. Nothing crazy but, fun. He sent an email later and, politely told me that he was disappointed but wanted to see me again. I thought, wow, this guy doesn't even know what he wants so, how can I? I agreed to a second session, decided to throw activities out the window and, asked him to simply tell him how he imagined himself feeling. For whatever reason, we had a blast. He saw me every week for the next ten years, with the occasional weekend session. Although I retired years ago, he's still a part of my life. None of that would have happened if he had not had the maturity to talk to me after our first session.
Sounds like your recent client exposed himself, early on, to be one of "Those guys" that isn't worth your time. Cheynne, Thanks for your comment. He certainly wasn't worth a shit! 
_________________________
Truth is everybody is going to hurt you: you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.
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#8936 - 12/28/19 06:05 AM
Re: Negative Review
[Re: marstoy]
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Enthusiast
Registered: 06/17/19
Posts: 285
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Fortunately I learned the importance of communication (and we ended up having a good laugh over my error) many years ago. I lived in the Bay Area and called Queen Adrena in LA to set up a session for 10:30 on a Saturday. Got up early and took a PSA flight down, got a rental car at the airport and called her to confirm I was on my way over. Ah, she thought our session was for 10:30 PM and I thought it was 10:30 AM!!! She had something going on but re-arranged her schedule and was able to see me by noon and we had a fabulous session. First I appreciated her helping smooth out my mistake. Second, I learned to make sure about minor details about such things as time, etc. when booking sessions, especially when traveling some distances. Thanks marstoy, I believe the old saying. “Everything is complicated if no one explains it to you.â€
_________________________
Truth is everybody is going to hurt you: you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.
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#8937 - 12/28/19 06:10 AM
Re: Negative Review
[Re: DommeLynx]
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Enthusiast
Registered: 06/17/19
Posts: 285
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Sometimes you just can't win. I had a gentleman arrive disappointed that I wasn't wearing a latex dress (He never mentioned anything about latex or dresses).
On top of that, he wanted strap. It's physically impossible to do that in a latex dress. Ugh. People don't think. DommeLynx, Thanks for the response. Some days it just doesn't pay to get out of bed. 
_________________________
Truth is everybody is going to hurt you: you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.
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#8938 - 12/28/19 06:18 AM
Re: Negative Review
[Re: tabula]
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Enthusiast
Registered: 06/17/19
Posts: 285
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I think this is a good topic for all to think about. Regarding an unsatisfying session, when should a sub write a negative review and when should they just move on?
I've had mostly wonderful experiences with ProDommes and I've limited myself to only writing reviews where I feel I can be positive. But there have been a few rare instances of "bad" sessions. All of them were due to poor communication. When those issues of communication have been my fault, I always just swallow my dissatisfaction and move on with a lesson learned.
But, there have been clear times when the communication issues have been on the Dommes side. I always describe the tenor of the session I'm looking for and list particular interests. When in email my interests are described as highly compatible, but then the session takes a completely different tone, I'm left a bit upset and can feel somewhat scammed. I've sometimes contacted the Domme after such a session and explained my dissatisfaction. I figure she might be able to use it as constructive criticism, but sometimes these devolve into a "blame game" where I'm told why I should have expected her to be a certain way.
However, contacting the Domme is one thing and posting a negative review is something completely different. These reviews affect the number of inquiries a Domme gets. So I've yet to post a negative review.
Besides, it's way more fun to post about positive experiences and boost the profiles of those exceptionally wonderful Dommes out there. Thanks tabula. Fortunately he didn't post the review. He decided to express his displeasure in an email.
_________________________
Truth is everybody is going to hurt you: you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.
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#8939 - 12/28/19 06:33 AM
Re: Negative Review
[Re: Poester]
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Enthusiast
Registered: 06/17/19
Posts: 285
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Poester, He didn't post the review. His diatribe was sent to me in an email. I checked his references,they came back A-OK. However, I don't personally know the Dommes he listed.
_________________________
Truth is everybody is going to hurt you: you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.
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#8973 - 12/31/19 04:33 AM
Re: Negative Review
[Re: Cheyenne]
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Addict
Registered: 07/12/19
Posts: 430
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This might work very well if the guy has a fantasy and the objective of the session is to fulfill it. To me a first session looks more like a game or a number of games you can play. You have to give a few pointers about which games you are into, and things you absolutely hate, in my case humiliation. I am curious what the mistress brings to the game. Could be things I would not know to ask for. The most important thing is the attitude, to try to find out what the other likes and a sense of fun and experimentation. I see myself as an active partner in the session. I do not believe in preset plans, and if a mistress cannot get the room temperature and customize her plan from the reactions she is getting this will not be an ideal session.
But if the session does not go well I take responsibility too. After all I started this, I initiated the session and I chose the mistress. Having done that I relax because I do not worry about things I cannot control.
Edited by Komodo (12/31/19 04:50 AM)
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