On a Saturday afternoon during the 1970s in one of Times Square's old burlesque theaters I was there to try and meet and convince a stripper from my old Brooklyn neighborhood to appear at my best friend's bachelor party to be held a few weeks later. I didn't succeed but I still remember seeing this old grandfather type, at ringside with a few young guys who could be his grandsons. He was there, in a suit, tie and white shirt, putting cash in the featured stripper's G-string and getting smothered by her breasts. I remember saying to myself, "I hope I don't act like THAT at his age!"

Yet, here I am, in my mid-60s, still online commenting on BDSM and sharing my experiences... and still doing sessions. "We mock the thing we are to be," as the 2000 Year Old Man once said.

Which brings up the question, "When is it time for a sub to retire?" Ms. Rose Woods asked the same about dominas here the other day, but what about us?

The easy answer for many subs would be the following, and not in order: budget; health; guilt; being outed; or a fundamental change in lifestyle (getting turned off by the scene, finding someone to do this in a lifestyle setting, etc.).

Being a sentimental fool a few years ago, when I turned 60, I tried to session with ladies I knew years before, or always wanted to serve. Over a year I served five ladies, two I knew in the '90s. With one of the '90s dominas, who was/is under-the-radar and semi-retired, the sparks clicked. We became uncontrollable. She's 20 years younger than me and continues to be imaginative, considerate and absolutely gorgeous. We did things I never did with her (or once or twice with others) and the volume of sessions and intensity were and are amazing.

In the past year and a half the sessions have been a lot fewer, lots of texts, but I've seen her a lot less since she is focusing on a vanilla career. I still have a budget for her reasonable tributes. A major session is scheduled soon, longer than normal. My roleplay is my screen name - I have to look the part for any believability.

My health is fine, muscle tone good and I keep in shape, but on some mornings after I do my exercises my joints are still stiff. I look at myself in the mirror this line said by Bogart in "Casablanca" comes to mind, and in a way, applies. "She did her best to convince me that she was still in love with me, but that was all over long ago. For your sake, she pretended it wasn't, and I let her pretend."

That's where I am now. The Mistress may or may not be pretending. And she makes me feel more desirable (dare I say sexy?) than I ever should feel. But I can see the old guy in the mirror. I've had more adventures, taken more chances and met more beautiful women than I ever thought possible. The memories are endless. Yet I think after this big session I will gracefully end my session life.

What do you think about all this? And, when do you think you might, if ever, end your session career?

The answer is simple. When it is no longer fun.

What's wrong with grandpa putting money in a strippers g-string?

Life is full of surprises, and appearances can be deceptive. For instance somebody looking at your name here could think that you really are a newbie.

So don't judge a book by its cover. Seriously speaking it is about how you feel. A few weeks ago I would have told you I am about to retire. I am in the process of changing my mind.

Just as with ladies in the FemDom scene, it is different for everyone. Sometimes, it isn't "retiring." It is a hiatus. I've seen my clients/friends fade in and, out when they get girlfriends, married, ect. Some times, they've just overdone it and, need a breather.

My late husband loved the scene. It didn't consume his life. He was quite traditional 80% of the time. But, that 20% of the time, it was on in a big way. He went through a period of time in his mid 60's where he just couldn't take the corporal he once wanted. I'll never forget, Jean Bardot and, I had him strung upside down by his ankles for a single tail whipping...and, he just wasn't his usual self. Jean and, I gave each other a look, as if to say, "We need to bring him down without embarrassing him." He flat out wasn't up for it. Skip to a year later, after hiatus and, he was back at everything, even to the point that I couldn't keep up.

He left the world when he was 74. Up until that unexpected time, he was at the gym every day. He was at every weekend event Michelle Lacy hosted and, going to Fetish Factory parties. Maybe it was the contrast between his scene life, which was quite extreme and, his home life that was Leave it Beaver traditional, that gave him the balance of playing and, retiring at the same time.

But, no one should be ashamed of their age or, feel they are too old. It is what you feel like doing at the moment.

A simple and elegant statement... and quite true.

As for the grandpa, there’s nothing wrong with that at all. That was my 20-something self talking.

Being of that age now, and speaking for a few I have known forever who have always been pretty good guys in their lives, today I see them marvel at truly beautiful women and are respectful at the same time.

A simple and elegant statement... and quite true.

As for the grandpa, there’s nothing wrong with that at all. That was my 20-something self talking.


It's not fun to have grandpa die like a dog on your Dungeon floor from a gut busting heart attack.



The police seriously frown on death by Domme.

But what a way to go

Over my time I have seen more than a few "Great Grandpa"s who could take a whipping more than any of these young pups could even imagine.

I think one's kink is likely to evolve with age and perhaps one loses interest as one's sexuality changes. I have no problem seeing older gentlemen as long as they are of sound mind. My bondage furniture is surprisingly comfortable.

I did have a client I saw a few times, many years ago, who had a massive stroke--not with me, but something that left him unable to make reasonable life choices. I felt that was highly inappropriate for me to see him again. He asked many times, but it just did not seem consensual to me.

Like they always say at least he died what he loved doing.

That’s how I feel. Age is just a number. I’m 42 and been retired a few years now.