To be perfectly honest I haven't observed this trend at all. There have always been shitty clients and I don't think twitter or dommes IDing as sex workers or #MeToo have anything to do with it.

I do think SESTA/FOSTA might have emboldened some of the shitty clients/timewasters -- those who pay attention to such things may have concluded that we're desperate for money and willing to put up with a lot more bullshit. I don't think this accounts for a huge difference though because lot of those shitty clients/timewasters don't really know much about SESTA/FOSTA at all. After all, there are very frequent posters here who seem pretty confused about it. People who aren't involved in our worlds often have no idea it even exists.

Clients who find me via twitter tend to be more well-behaved than the ones who find me via other methods. "Familiarity breeds contempt" and all that but people who see me as a whole person rather than as some BDSM provider on an ad site tend to treat me with more respect. Not a hard and fast rule by any means but a definite trend I've noticed.

Thanks for adding to the discussion. I was hoping to hear from Dommes form other geographical areas.


That is good to hear. It gives me hope that this is not a trend but just a phase.


I agree. Anytime I have mentioned it, subs have no idea what I am talking about.

Speaking for me, I would love to know all of these practical expenses and where goes a tribute in details.
I actually find all these practical aspects to handle very attractive when it comes to pro-dommes. You Ladies "have" to take great care of your look, but also have an above-average interest and understanding of human psychology, while in the same time be able to run a genuine business and constantly stay visible on the internet in a very competitive environment. It's hard to think of another activity that has got this all-around package for only one person. Oh, and did I mention the guts that it take to meet potentially dangerous strangers?

All of this seems very Alpha to me

But no doubt, for some subs, probably the majority of them, that would be killing the fantasy!




I shall! Thank you.

Thank you for opening, as you usually do, such an interesting subject. It seems that it touched a raw nerve and created lots of subtopics, many deserving their own threads.

To me the biggest differentiation is not sex but age. I think that the new generation has attention deficit syndrome, cannot focus for more than 8 seconds on a subject, and a lot of the rest follows. Tweet is good, email is bad. Facebook is preferable to picking up the phone. Short bursts of superficial multicast messages are preferable to a serious one on one conversation.

You see these from men, I see it from women, including mistresses. As I said I think that age trumps sex.

I agree with you 200% on the problems of equating a mistress with a SW. To me it seems this started a few years ago. I fought, hard, against it, I got so much push back that I am not doing it any longer, although I totally disagree.

It is obvious that SW do things that dommes don't, and vice versa. It is way more difficult to train as a mistress, and I do not understand why they insist they are just SWers.

I noticed on this matter a division by tier and age too.

There are many factors which increase the toxicity of the exchange and increase acrimoniousness. For me Me Too is one of them, I had a lot of respect for Catherine Deneuve (pas moi) I wish there were more like her.

It is true that now men are caught between a rock and a hard place, I am extremely annoyed by the kind of tweets you mention, especially because I think I could always win a fair verbal fight, but it would be ungentlemanly.

Here I can explain the tier thing. While technically I follow more mistresses on Twitter in reality I interact only with 3. What I noticed is that they are all open minded but sometimes there are second and third tier mistresses who join the conversation and they are rude.

Something else, no matter how obscure a 15 year mistress is, she will have a few devoted subs liking, echoing and repeating everything she says (chaque sot trouve un plus sot qui l'admire).