In general, when you go to any professional, the clock starts, when your selected time starts. If you've had a pre-session call to discuss details, the correct etiquette is to begin the session with the protocol expected of you as you enter the space and into the session. I have always had time to get to know the sub serving me while also advancing through the session. Seductive interrogation and mindplay are wonderful ways to set a scene.

As for the length of a session, I generally do time tributed as time played unless the sub arrives late. If a sub is late, they're eating into their own time as I cannot hold my time up because someone didn't make the right buffer window–that is basic respect.

In the past, when MF was the go-to forum, folks used to post which Domme was "not a clockwatcher" acting as if having time boundaries was somehow a bad thing that a Domme should've been penalized for, as if everyone here doesn't have regard for their own time). In reality, the time that goes into a session and post session are largely unnoticed by subs. When you set up for an hour is actually closer to 3 or 4 from prep to cleanup depending on the session and interests explored.

On some occasions, if I am delighted by someone's service I might allow a little extra time but always remember that those who are kept a little longer once in a blue) are also those most helpful and attentive (helping clean up, perhaps fetching a post session meal, etc.,)in showing gratitude and mindfulness of the Domme and her time.

Ooooh, I remember these debates. I also remember struggling with thinking, yes it is sooo much work to set up, get into the focused mindset of a session and then clean (many multiples of the actual session time) why not just throw in an extra 15 minutes or so? My experience with this was instead of being appreciated, my time was devalued, which was very frustrating for me and made sessions less enjoyable for me. (When sessions are less enjoyable, oh-boy, one can tell the difference.) Also, most clients have lives and schedules that need to be respected.

So I agree with you 100%. Be professional and clear boundries work for everyone.

I’ve had such a wide range of experiences with this.

I’ve had a couple times a Domme ask me if I was on a tight schedule and when I said no, just really take her time and go way over with our session.

I’ve paid for 2 hours and had it end after 45 minutes

I had a session once where the Domme kept complaining how busy her day was and that she needed to drive to a city a couple of hours away. She then sat on the edge of the bed looking at her watch literally every five minutes while she very unenthusiasticly kicked me in the nuts. That was a surreal experience

I had a session where I arrived on time, the Domme told me she was running a few minutes late and to wait at the gas station outside and she’d text me when ready. After about a 1/2 hour, I texted and she said she forgot I was outside. Lol

I just look at it as good stories and good memories

You posted this in the Reviews section but it doesn't belong there as it's not a review but a discussion about sessions, expectations, and ethics, so I moved it here.

Before someone selects a Domme, they should read about the things that are important to them. What her limits and interests are; her experience and reputation; are you looking for someone who rents a dungeon, books a hotel room, or has their own studio; her tribute; and her protocol.

See if she talks about how she structures her practice, her sessions, her time overall. If she doesn't mention what's important to you, ask her. If she's shitty to you about it take that as a sign; but only if she actually doesn't mention it, not because you're trying to get free attention and she is rightfully annoyed.

Personally, I like to know what to expect when I schedule an appointment or ask for help from someone. So, I use my own preferences and ethics to make decisions about my practice.

If someone asks for a 2-hour session I assume they want 2 hours of play, not 90 minutes of play with 30 minutes of not play.

Does the Domme have the right to make her "2 hour" scenes 90 minutes of play and 30 minutes of whatever? Absolutely. But she should be up front about that. Otherwise she will be called into question.

For me, the tribute is for 2 hours of play. This tribute does not include the consultation. The reason it doesn't is because you need one the first time you see me but not the second, third, and so on. That translates into that cost being a part of the first time I'm going to meet you and not the subsequent times. Unless you don't plan on coming often. Then you may need another. But I usually give discounted or free ones depending on various factors.

I explain all this clearly. Why? Because I appreciate it when I'm on the client side of things. I think it's good practice and ethical. And those things are important to me. I do not like to feel taken advantage of, tricked, or scammed, so I don't do that to others.

You tribute for a 4-hour session? That's exactly what you get. Sometimes I'm so good (smile and wink) that I will end the session 4 hours to the minute from when I started.

Now, though I allow a little chat before and after the scene, I do not allow couch surfers. The guys want the 4 hours of play and then another hour of sitting on my couch, socializing. I get it but that's not what the scene includes, sir. Please finish your juice and have a nice day. Email me if you want to do it again. For now, I want to take a shower and eat dinner. Next time, book social time afterward and we can have dinner together.

“I do not allow couch surfers.” I’m not familiar with the term, but that is one heck of a line! LOL!

Looking back at my sessions, I can honestly say I never lingered or was a “couch surfer.” I was usually on a schedule and I assumed the Mistress was too. If the Mistress wanted to engage in a little conversation after a session, I’d appreciate it, but I’d never push it.

Great response....I'd say you nailed it. If I book 2 hours I'd expect 5 mins or so of "Hi how are you upon arrival" and 10 minutes or so of getting cleaned up and dressed before departure that was mostly exclusive of the 2 hour session. Now, I'm not getting bend out of shape if the session ends at 1:53 and certainly OK if it's 2.:04 (sometimes sessons have natural conclusion point) but it needs to be close.

I see the pre and post session time as part of the Domme's overhead that should be factored into her rates.

What I say "couch surfer" I'm talking about the guys who plop down and drape their arms over the back and you can tell by the way they get all settled they plan on being there for at least 30 minutes or more.

I'm a generous person. In most ways. So, this translates into how I run my practice. But I have learned important lessons on generosity in this work. In that some people are just as generous back...and others are huge takers.

Though I like to give people the X hours they're tributing for, I also know that some people will take their own sweet time to get dressed afterward. And so those people have the Something More Than Just Getting Dressed taken out of their scene.



This thread has rung a bell for me. I thought I was undercharging before. Now I absolutely know I need to increase my rates. Shitty economy or not.

Thanks for everyone sharing. Glad it was not just me. In all my years I have been blessed to have some amazing sessions and met some incredible Dommes. I would say 80% were great/good. Of the 20% a couple missed completely. These sessions were from apprx 2005 to 2020. Back then one could afford to miss here or there. After 2020 I have probably sessioned 10-15 times. Only one was outstanding and had a real connection and 2 incredible sessions. It was early in her career and she quickly became in high demand and I got out priced.

I agree. I have always been grateful and appreciated someone was fair with me and will continue to be. I have recently been in contact with lovely lady and my gut feels she is very genuine and we be doing our first 2 hour session in 2 weeks.