I cam across this on Mastodon this morning

I suspect there is more than a little truth in that!

I suspect that is why they often charge more than FS providers. Good BDSM requires more intelligence and effort.

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Let's not forget that top tier Dommes have many tens of thousands of dollars invested in gear and customs dungeon furniture too......plus hours of pre session prep and post session cleanup.

I thought of this post last night while having dinner with a colleague of mine here in Paris. She is has been a part time professional for about five years now, but she is thinking about giving up the professional part because she finds it too emotionally draining.

Her main, vanilla job is hospice care for children under 16.

Food for thought.

M

My books show that 60% of my tribute goes to costs.

So there's that.

This is a familiar story for me. Over the years with Mistresses I knew well, we would discuss the scene. More than a few mentioned the emotional baggage some subs inadvertently dumped on them. (Of course there were always very few but memorable customers - I won't call them subs - who went out of their way bringing their negative emotions into sessions.) A lot of subs can be oblivious to all of this.

I once saw a Domme several times who shared that her vanilla job was as a therapist for people struggling with addictions. I moved from the area, returned several years later, and contacted her. She was no longer a Prodomme. She said it had become too stressful and emotionally draining.

I wonder if most subs know how so very fortunate we are that Dommes do what they do.

Burn out is real. Many of us long timers have taken a year off here and there.

I find I focus more on what I enjoy and think a lot about an unpleasant sub who will drain me for long after the session has ended. I say "no" a lot these days. I suffer financially, but I am over all happier.

Not most subs, but definitely enough to keep me here.