Originally Posted By Domina M
I would like to interject here that "Service Top" has a bad reputation. I absolutely identify as a Service Top as a part of being a professional. I provide a service for a price, but that doesn't mean I "do as I am told" or lack boundaries.


That is not what service topping means, though. Providing a "service" as a professional is not what is implied as "service" in BDSM. Service is what slaves do, i.e. submission. A service top is a submissive top.

If a client comes to me and says, "Mistress, I'd like to book a spanking session." And then he shows up and I spank him, that does not make my doing so an act of submission. That is a misunderstanding of power exchange.

So, when you say that it doesn't mean that you do as you're told, you may be identifying as a service top without realizing that is not quite what you mean. Perhaps you are thinking that you are a top who provides a service to your clients, which is something else, and something that most of us do.

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Categories can be interesting and useful as one cannot be all things at all times and there are different mind sets, but they can break down quickly if put under too much scrutiny. For the most part, I agree with your observations, but would be careful with them as a "hierarchy."


Categories, or language as a whole, are approximations. They are used to communicate an idea. I think some categorizations have more wiggle room than others.

As far a hierarchies: I think they're helpful to define and organize. But I wouldn't assume there is an implication that one is inherently "better" than the other.

In the context of this conversation about FinDom/FinDumb/FemDom, yes, my list is a hierarchy of someone more Dominant to less Dominant to not Dominant at all.

It's like making a hierarchy of Mexican food. Food made by indigenous Mexicans would be at the top and Taco Bell would be at the bottom. That's fair, isn't it?