Hi Junglebeast:

Good to hear from you and thanks so much for your reply. I'm glad my post resonated with you. People outside the scene sometimes have a negative view of what we get up to, but in your post, I found words like "joy," and "trust," which most would agree speak to very positive emotions. At it's best, I believe Femdom and BDSM can be an incredibly joyful, very positive and genuinely therapeutic experience, at least I have found it be so. I've also seen the other side of it. I get emotionally involved with the dommes I see, and that can be risky. Although they can become extremely personal over time, these are essentially professional relationships, so boundaries on both sides are desirable and necessary. It took me a long time to figure out how to make that work, but now that I have, my life as a client has improved dramatically. Also, the choice of a Mistress is very important to me, much more so than it would be if I were just a casual client dropping by for a quick "wham, bam, thank you Ma'am!" As you said, trust is the key. I trust MVC absolutely, not just with my body, but also with my mind and my heart. You said: "I need to serve a Mistress I know well." Yes. Absolutely. I totally agree with and relate to that sentiment. You also said: "But in the past two, three years I've used it as self-medication for probable mild depression." I can see a session working as a temporary fix for depression, but if you're struggling with even a mild form of that, I'd recommend seeing a real therapist. I had to deal with my issues and figure what they were before I was ready to approach professional femdom in a healthy, well-balanced manner. I found a kink-friendly therapist who was tremendously helpful to me and put me on the right track. I wish you the best of luck with your lady and hope you're able to reconnect with her. Always good speaking with you!