I saw a well known Domme tweet that she is now requiring application fees/gifts to apply for a session. I’ve seen this a few times lately, seems to be gaining in popularity.
I have mixed feelings on it personally. On one hand, I feel like just bake it into your session rate, don’t charge me an application fee. I’m fine with deposits, but this feels a bridge too far.
On the other hand,if I had to deal with the time wasters and general crap Dommes experience,I’d probably charge application fees too
*waves* Hi. I'm a Domme who "charges" an "application fee".
I started this about 2 years ago. And I wish I would have been doing it all along. Here's why.
There is so much noise that comes with this job.
Guys who call/email/fill out a web form to...
...talk about a session they probably want but vacillate about for whatever reason.
...talk about a session they don't actually want but pretend to for attention.
...talk about a session they don't actually want. Filling out your form IS the session.
...ask you for a date/sex/lifestyle relationship.
...harass and threaten you.
Imagine that most of what comes in falls under the above and that the minority is actually people who are serious about making something happen.
Do you know how exhausting it can be to deal with this? How disrespected we can feel when we put ourselves out there, listen to or read your messages to us, take them seriously, give you the respect and answer you only to discover it's bullshit?
After 8 years of having a part-time job of Bullshit Management I decided to change my practice and put my form behind a tiny little paywall.
You know what happened?
ALL OF THE BULLSHIT WENT BYE BYE.
That stuff above? It doesn't happen when you ask people to send a little something up front to ask for a session.
I'm sorry to all you cheapskates, fickle dicks, and suspicious types but asking for money up front is one of the most effective ways to keep the headaches away.
I am SO MUCH happier since I've started asking for a little "gift" to have access (which I allow to be applied, in full, to the session stuff) and my clients are better quality. I have FANTASTIC clients, who I cherish.
And deposits aren't the answer. For one, they're more expensive. Two, I don't ask for a deposit on a session until we're both sure we want to have one. I don't know if I want to have one with you until I speak to you first. So, I've never asked for a deposit up-front.
The vast majority of people who have sent a little something up front end up becoming clients -- which is exactly. what. I. want. to. happen.
See, I'm serious and I only want to deal with serious people. This has been an excellent way to find those people.
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