Mistress Michele's comment in another thread here about how often well known Dommes get impersonated by scammers online got me thinking. As more and more Dommes are requiring deposits (in many cases fairly significant amounts) to book a session maybe we need a discussion of warning signs and red flags to watch out for.....and ways you can insure you are actually communicating with who you think you are?

Would love to hear some tips about how to avoid this.

One thing I watch for is a professional website that has been there for awhile and has contact info on the site.

Back when the "I'm calling from your bank and need your credentials" scam was new I would tell those people that I would hang up and call the bank back at the number posted on their web site.

You could do the same when contacting a well known prodomme.

Do a web search to see how many web sites and social media profiles they have. Figure out which aren't authentic.

Be aware that scammers are actually copying websites for Dommes as well as Dungeons and just posting them in different cities.

Look for continuity in the methods of contact, like the same email and phone number listed on social media and a website. That being said I have a couple different websites and email addresses but they all correlate and link back to each other. I also have a ton of imposters -which I've posted about here before- that simply steal photos and use an email or website thats a letter or two off, but they copy every post!

Twitter has the date an account started at the top of every profile, check that they weren't started yesterday. On some instagram accounts you can click "about this account" and some will tell you the location of the account. One of My imposters was based in Nigeria! Websites sometimes will have the date created at the bottom of the page as well.

Also most Dommes do not solicit clients. I know it's a dream come true for some that a Domme would pick YOU to contact --but like everything else in life, if it seems too good to be true it probably is, and you probably should do a little more research.
Use your best judgement and try not to think with the wrong head.

When booking sessions or communicating with subs I try to get the scheduling/negotiation down first! It should be a huge red flag when someone starts messaging you with any fantasy or D/s instructions before there's an actual session booked. I won't have any discussion of your interests without a date, deposit and application completed.

Google Image search and reverse image lookups are your friend. If you plug a photo into those sites you can easily see where else they're posted and see if the pics are stolen.

Yep. IRL dommes will not cold contact people.

I would add that most dominas will not do a heavy sell, either. I am not going to pressure anyone, as there are a plethora of problems that come with that mentality.

All good advice. Thanks for taking the time to post.

I never even considered a Domme soliciting me to book a session. it's never happened to me in 40 years of pro play so it would certainly be a red flag

It used to happen to me on X.com and Instagram until I blocked some things.

I get impersonated a lot so I wrote a very comprehensive blog post about it to direct it to every person who messaged me saying they lost $600 (one of my scammers was quite prolific and successful).

https://youremybit.ch/impersonators-and-scammers/

Lmk if you guys think of it or if I should update it.x

I came here to brag about your blog post.

And yes in 99% of the scam cases the scammer is trying to contact you usually through a social media private message.

Great post. I'm sorry people are getting scammed. I don't session super regularly so my perspective maybe isn't as informed, but I do get follower requests frequently on kink social accounts that are obviously from fake dommes and imposters. It's pretty easy for me to spot (and I do report them). One of your best points is to check out the social media accounts they are following and who are following them. You should see other dommes in the mix.

As a side note, and sorry for hijacking this thread, but you twice mentioned kinky dating apps and I'm wondering which for you are the best, if you'd be willing to answer.

I've been discussing scammers and their behaviors for years.

FetLife and Twitter are havens for scammers because it's so easy to set up an account, execute scam, and delete said account. Most of these scammers are men. Who better to scam a horny guy than another guy?

I posted a thread here: http://domina.ms/~domroot/thebuzz/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=19154&nt=2&page=1

I wrote about knowing if it's me, specifically, in my blog, but it applies to others: https://www.mtbdsmlog.com/is-it-mistress-tissa-or-a-scammer/

I mention a known and persistent scammer "Indian Mistress Seema", one of the rare scammers who has bothered with a website: https://www.mtbdsmlog.com/professional-scammer-indian-mistress-seema/

I also regularly write about and point out scammers on FetLife. I used to on Twitter as well until they suspended me.