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#20565 - 04/16/24 03:33 AM Deposit Lost from famous domme
Dominions Offline
Member

Registered: 01/25/24
Posts: 19
Anyone encountered this?

It was a while back and a legit domme, with a strong online and video presence in Canada. I put in an application through her website and she responded confirming the dates, and asked for a $50 deposit by amazon giftcard.

Cut to the week itself, she cancelled abrutpy and offered a date which I would have left Canada by then. Despite several emails, I have not gotten the deposit back.

Anyone encountered this? I'm hesitant to name names, but it is a rather legit and well-known prodomme. This makes me now hesitant to place deposit except by Paypal because there is no recourse. Not only did I lose the deposit, the time I set aside was wasted (I could have seen someone else and that was the greater cost).

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#20567 - 04/16/24 04:39 AM Re: Deposit Lost from famous domme [Re: Dominions]
cbtlover Offline
Regular

Registered: 10/19/15
Posts: 120
Loc: Tampa, Florida
The experience you are describing is the major reason why so many subs don't want to pay deposits. I have heard, and read horror stories about abrupt cancellations with no refunds. The entire BDSM scene seems to be much sketchier with Twitter/X as it's main advertising platform.


Please publish her website URL. We need to know so she doesn't pull the same crap with other subs.

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#20568 - 04/16/24 04:54 AM Re: Deposit Lost from famous domme [Re: Dominions]
Chi61 Online   content
Regular

Registered: 06/22/16
Posts: 186
I had something similar happen a couple years ago. I posted about it here at the time. A legit, well known Domme from the West Coast was traveling to Florida. I booked a session for when she was her, gave a deposit (I think it was $100) and then about a day before the session she stopped responding. I know she was still in the area because she was posting about the trip on her Twitter feed.

I wrestled with posting her name here and calling her out about it on Twitter but ultimately did not. I emailed a couple times asking for my deposit back, got no response and decided to move on.

I will say, I have been sessioning many years and have given many deposits and this happened once. I still give deposits with no hesitation and have not had any other issues. It is extremely rare in my experience with established Dommes.

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#20569 - 04/16/24 05:03 AM Re: Deposit Lost from famous domme [Re: Chi61]
cbtlover Offline
Regular

Registered: 10/19/15
Posts: 120
Loc: Tampa, Florida
Sorry this happened to you.

This is the place to publish her website URL.

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#20570 - 04/16/24 06:08 AM Re: Deposit Lost from famous domme [Re: Dominions]
furfan Online   content
Enthusiast

Registered: 01/20/21
Posts: 388
When was this? Vancouver?



There is a well known Canadian based Domme there who I had sessioned with before who didn't respond at all to a session request I sent both by email and then several days later via her contact forum on her website.(This was in the spring of 2022)

A little online sleuthing on a local review board turned up several complaints of her becoming a little erratic. A few reports of no response, last minute cancellations, taking a booking (and deposit) then going silent and even one report of a no show at a double domme session. At the same time there were glowing reviews still being posted.....and there have been positive reviews posted since so hard to know what to think. Maybe she was going through a bad period or got really busy and was overwhelmed with admin stuff? In any event it seemed out of character as the sessions I had with her were top notch and she seemed like a genuinely nice person.

One response to the bad reviews suggested it was more a case of her being very busy, poorly organized and a little flakey rather than actual malice.

Fortunately I've never had an issue with a deposit. The way I see it you are always taking a bit of a risk sending a deposit. You can reduce the risk to virtually zero by sessioning with an established and well known Domme but it will never be absolutely zero.



Edited by furfan (04/16/24 08:17 AM)

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#20571 - 04/16/24 07:13 AM Re: Deposit Lost from famous domme [Re: Dominions]
international Online   content
Artisan

Registered: 07/25/19
Posts: 95
I am sorry this happened to you.

So far, this has never happened to me. I have only made good experiences with deposits - and I very much understand that a domina requests it.

But my point is a different one:
It is a common (and I agree polite) practice on this board that positive reviews are posted with the name of the domina, whereas negative reviews are anonymous.

I am not sure if this really is a service to the community. It somehow puts all dominas that fulfill the broader description under suspicion. (Speculation has already started on this thread).
What's the purpose of posting a negative event when not giving the community detailed enough information to avoid it?

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#20572 - 04/16/24 07:20 AM Re: Deposit Lost from famous domme [Re: Dominions]
Domina M Online   content

Enthusiast

Registered: 10/30/15
Posts: 392
Loc: Paris, France
I am so sorry that happened to you. I think a measured review in the appropriate section of this site is relevant. Dommes need deposits these days, or it would be a shit show. Clients need to know that we are safe when giving deposits.

Being a professional means being professional. Things come up, even at the last minute, but this means being able to make things right. If a domme was practicing unsafe or unethical practices, it's good for everyone to know.

Again, be measured in your post's words. State facts and perhaps your feelings. Insults or inflammatory language will backfire on you. This post tells me that you are capable of a calm presentation of the facts.
_________________________
I've broken all my toys. Would you like to be broken?

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#20573 - 04/16/24 07:22 AM Re: Deposit Lost from famous domme [Re: Domina M]
Soapy Online   happy
Addict

Registered: 10/10/15
Posts: 645
+1

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#20574 - 04/16/24 08:01 AM Re: Deposit Lost from famous domme [Re: Domina M]
cbtlover Offline
Regular

Registered: 10/19/15
Posts: 120
Loc: Tampa, Florida
Dommes who deceive for the purpose of theft are criminals. They need to be put on blast! It is a disservice to withhold their identities. It is also a disservice to legitimate Mistresses.

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#20575 - 04/16/24 08:15 AM Re: Deposit Lost from famous domme [Re: cbtlover]
furfan Online   content
Enthusiast

Registered: 01/20/21
Posts: 388
Originally Posted By cbtlover
Dommes who deceive for the purpose of theft are criminals. They need to be put on blast! It is a disservice to withhold their identities. It is also a disservice to legitimate Mistresses.


Agree in principle but in this case I don't know.......

What established and well known Domme is going to deliberately start scamming $50 Amazon cards? Seems pretty small potatoes. I wonder if it isn't a case of a Domme to busy and/or too lazy to return the deposit afterr the client declined the alternate date offered rather than an actual scam?.......or if the issue just got lost in her crazy full inbox


Edited by furfan (04/16/24 08:16 AM)

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