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When should I start worrying that I've been ghosted by a domme?
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All weekend servitude session with introduction to ball busting with the one true Goddess, Goddess Lilith
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Topic Options
#17267 - 05/31/22 05:50 PM Re: Ghosted [Re: Mistress Ayn]
Chi61 Online   content
Enthusiast

Registered: 06/22/16
Posts: 224
Thanks to all for your thoughts/suggestions. I did send an email today requesting a refund. If I don’t get a response in a week or so, I’ll try a text on SP.

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#17271 - 05/31/22 07:18 PM Re: Ghosted [Re: Mistress Ayn]
furfan Online   content
Addict

Registered: 01/20/21
Posts: 457
Great attitude to take Mistress......probably why you are successful long term.

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#17273 - 05/31/22 09:25 PM Re: Ghosted [Re: Mistress Ayn]
DommeLynx Online   content

Regular

Registered: 07/09/19
Posts: 188
Loc: Jersey City, NJ
Originally Posted By Mistress Ayn
I 100% agree with those that say you should ask for your money back. Don't let this go. Besides, it's more about your time and emotions (looking forward to the session and then let down by being ghosted). This behavior is not the norm among established Dommes, I assure you. And it doesn't matter what the reason is. She should refund your deposit and offer an apology - and a spiff. Free fan site access - something. That is what a professional would do in a circumstance like this.


100% agree with Mistress Ayn.
_________________________
Goddess Erika Lynx
Playful, Creative, and Sensual Female Domination.
NJ. NYC. MA

www.GoddessLynx.com
www.Loyalfans.com/dommelynx
www.Twitter.com/DommeLynx
https://bsky.app/profile/dommelynx.bsky.social

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#17336 - 06/10/22 09:44 AM Re: Ghosted [Re: buffalo]
Mistress Tissa Online   content

Sage

Registered: 11/02/15
Posts: 838
Loc: Philadelphia
Originally Posted By buffalo
That has to be a frustrating and infuriating experience sitting in your space as the appointment time comes and goes with no call or sign of the client.


In my 7.5 years as a pro I've never had a no-show. I think it's because I weed out the types who do that sort of thing, and as a result I have a fantastic group of clients.

Quote:
I can see why deposits are required. At least you’ve got something for the time invested in traveling to the space and preparing.


Absolutely. Unless you have no wardrobe, no equipment, no business expenses, and are holding improv-style sessions out of your bedroom, you have costs, both material and labor, in this line of work. Deposits offer some economic and emotional protection.

There are many other professions that require deposits. People who act offended by them are just upset because they won't be able to ghost you without repercussion. It's a great way to vet your clients. wink

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#17338 - 06/10/22 10:04 AM Re: Ghosted [Re: Mistress Tissa]
Soapy Online   happy
Addict

Registered: 10/10/15
Posts: 688
Agreed.

I have a life long habit of showing up for appointments,meetings, etc I ask for.

I never felt like deposits were a big deal.

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#17425 - 06/23/22 07:20 PM Re: Ghosted [Re: Mistress Tissa]
buffalo Online   content
Addict

Registered: 06/21/19
Posts: 401
Loc: USA
Mistress Tisza Sorry I meant to reply to this and forgot.

Tbh I’d prefer deposits weren’t necessary but I can definitely see why they are. There is a definite mental commitment on the part of the sub once he puts that deposit down which I actually like because then I know it’s on and there’s an anticipation and excitement that builds. My problem is I am very paranoid about leaving a paper trail with things like Venmo Zelle Cash App etc. But I have been lucky and found Dommes who will work with me and take Amazon gift cards which can be purchased at supermarkets etc and I send them the code and have had no problems.
_________________________
And still trying to figure it all out.................. buffalo

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#17435 - 06/28/22 05:09 PM Re: Ghosted [Re: buffalo]
Mistress Tissa Online   content

Sage

Registered: 11/02/15
Posts: 838
Loc: Philadelphia
Originally Posted By buffalo
Tbh I’d prefer deposits weren’t necessary but I can definitely see why they are.


I don't think most people would say they prefer deposits.

Quote:
I am very paranoid about leaving a paper trail with things like Venmo Zelle Cash App etc. But I have been lucky and found Dommes who will work with me and take Amazon gift cards which can be purchased at supermarkets etc and I send them the code and have had no problems.


There's other ways to work around concerns like yours. You can look for Domme who also allow you to mail payments.

I don't accept gift cards as payment for my work because I can't pay my mortgage with a gift card.

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#17460 - 07/04/22 07:54 PM Re: Ghosted [Re: Chi61]
Komodo Offline
Addict

Registered: 07/12/19
Posts: 430
One more thing to consider. Are you sure it was that established mistress you send the deposit to rather than a scam artist? Can you contact her through a different channel to check out the story?

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