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#11065 - 05/29/20 04:59 AM
Re: FemDom resentment
[Re: Mistress Ayn]
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Addict
Registered: 07/12/19
Posts: 430
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There are all kinds of people in both sexes. My impression is that a large majority of people I see here are respectful and well mannered. If there is any bias it is in the favor of women, which is not a big surprise considering the nature of the site.
I go by the principle what is sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander, probably not the common view here. I know, in the back of the mind of many readers, probably the guy was romantically interested, was rejected, and this is the cause of the change. For situations like these you are obviously right.
However there is as well the equal possibility that the Pro Domme did something to disappoint or hurt the other guy, in which case his reaction might be normal. My opinion is that there are only individual cases, they should be judged by their own merits, and aggregating is not easy.
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#15094 - 06/27/21 10:03 PM
Re: FemDom resentment
[Re: Mistress Tissa]
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Member
Registered: 06/27/21
Posts: 3
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#15095 - 06/28/21 06:30 AM
Re: FemDom resentment
[Re: Mistress Ayn]
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Pooh-Bah
Registered: 07/12/19
Posts: 2304
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While most of the men I've met through femdom are fantastic people, I've come across what you are describing a few times over the years. My feeling is that they have a fetish addiction and resent that we hold the keys. The hate they throw toward us is projection of how they feel about their the slavery they are in to the own fetishes. I've always avoided the type that are OCD about their fetishes. I feel bad for them but don't want any part of an unhealthy relationship with kink.
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#15096 - 06/28/21 07:42 AM
Re: FemDom resentment
[Re: Mistress Ayn]
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Enthusiast
Registered: 12/12/20
Posts: 288
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It is a turn off to see men act like assholes to women. I don't care what the reason is. I don't want to see that kind of behavior.
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#15099 - 06/28/21 12:24 PM
Re: FemDom resentment
[Re: Cheyenne]
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Addict
Registered: 01/20/21
Posts: 416
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People who are polite,respectful and kind (regardless of whether they are a Domme or a sub, male or female) are always my preferences. Life's too short..... others should be avoided/ignored.
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#15100 - 06/28/21 01:06 PM
Re: FemDom resentment
[Re: Cheyenne]
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Veteran
Registered: 10/13/15
Posts: 1318
Loc: Romania
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The most spot on answer yet. Thanks, Cheyenne.
_________________________
Making grown men cry . . . and loving every minute of it. Main website: www.mistressayn.comContent site: www.aynrules.com Follow Me on Twitter - @MistressAyn
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#15104 - 06/28/21 06:04 PM
Re: FemDom resentment
[Re: Soapy]
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Enthusiast
Registered: 10/18/15
Posts: 282
Loc: Atlanta
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Also known as the "Nice Guy" in the vanilla world.
Low self confidence men who make contracts with women, without telling them, that if they do nice things for them the woman will return affection. When that doesn't happen they turn nasty.
This is exactly the personality type I think of when reminded of this issue. I've experienced this the most when the "sub" feels rejected, and therefore insecure. For example; A client asking to push limits I'm not comfortable with, A sub being denied a request, A slave being disciplined for bad behavior. I think these men involved in the scene have a certain entitlement that makes them feel as though they don't have to take responsibility for their actions, and that their needs are somehow more important than a Woman's own personal boundaries. They often have this attitude that says, "Its not my actions that caused any issues its the big-bad-Domme who's saying NO and sticking to their guns who's the problem!" They usually pretend to want to be Dominated, but what they really want is to have control over their Dommes. Just another hissy fit from a man-child who can't get their way in my opinion!
Edited by Mistress UV (06/28/21 06:13 PM)
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#15105 - 06/28/21 06:56 PM
Re: FemDom resentment
[Re: furfan]
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Pooh-Bah
Registered: 07/12/19
Posts: 2304
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#15108 - 06/28/21 11:35 PM
Re: FemDom resentment
[Re: Mistress UV]
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Regular
Registered: 06/12/19
Posts: 104
Loc: Pensacola, FL
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Also known as the "Nice Guy" in the vanilla world.
Low self confidence men who make contracts with women, without telling them, that if they do nice things for them the woman will return affection. When that doesn't happen they turn nasty.
This is exactly the personality type I think of when reminded of this issue. I've experienced this the most when the "sub" feels rejected, and therefore insecure. For example; A client asking to push limits I'm not comfortable with, A sub being denied a request, A slave being disciplined for bad behavior. I think these men involved in the scene have a certain entitlement that makes them feel as though they don't have to take responsibility for their actions, and that their needs are somehow more important than a Woman's own personal boundaries. They often have this attitude that says, "Its not my actions that caused any issues its the big-bad-Domme who's saying NO and sticking to their guns who's the problem!" They usually pretend to want to be Dominated, but what they really want is to have control over their Dommes. Just another hissy fit from a man-child who can't get their way in my opinion! You're dead on Sister. There's a man-child behind every bush in the scene!
_________________________
The question isn't who is going to let me; it's who is going to stop me.
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#15110 - 06/29/21 12:16 AM
Re: FemDom rersentment
[Re: TheDriver]
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Addict
Registered: 07/12/19
Posts: 430
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I don't want to distract from the great meeting of the minds but there was a really remarkable post originally, from a remarkable man, which maybe deserved a little more recognition: It depends on how you define "solid".
Respectfully, I don't see what you describe as a solid. Is it tenable? Sure. But let's be honest: if you can't really be yourself with your own partner that's not usually understood as a function of a solid relationship
Mistress Tissa Complex subject. Honestly, I've never felt going to a dominatrix allowed me to be myself....I always felt going was an escape from my real self and the real world.....a fantasy to enjoyed once in a while. Its great fun, but it doesn't define me, nor does it detract from my ability to have a solid relationship. When BDSM become socially acceptable, maybe it will be easier for everyone. The Driver
Edited by Komodo (06/29/21 12:23 AM)
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