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#14486 - 05/16/21 04:51 AM Consensual non consent in Pro sessions?
furfan Online   content
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Registered: 01/20/21
Posts: 416
I'm wondering how common some form of CNC is in pro sessions? I have incorporated elements of this in both pro sessions and private play. Although, in pro sessions it has been somewhat limited to just applying to certain activities with other hard limits still being respected. In some ways I suspect engaging in this with an established and well known pro Domme would actually be safer than what can happen in real life.
I have used pre negotiated CNC in the past to experience forced (pump gag with a funnel in the breathing tube) golden consumption...... also to create an extended session requiring more than one orgasm on my part where play continued when I hade climaxed and was no longer aroused. Activities during the period before becoming aroused again have always been truly NC for me but have resulted in some great sessions with very hot memories.

We kept a safe word/safe signal but it was only good to communicate a problem and it was agreed it's use would trigger a penalty.

It's interesting to note that this term seems to have come to refer mostly to rape fantasy. When you Google it most to the links are related to this rather than BDSM play.


Edited by furfan (05/16/21 05:00 AM)

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#14490 - 05/16/21 06:34 PM Re: Consensual non consent in Pro sessions? [Re: furfan]
The Thomas Online   content
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Registered: 10/20/15
Posts: 448
It is not common but neither is it very rare. I have dabbled with it on occasion. Once again I will refer to this thread about s scene which had a CNC element

http://domina.ms/~domroot/thebuzz/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=3510#Post3510

However I would hazard a guess that for every time it actually happens in a session there is another instance where the Domme talks the sub out of it. The problem is it can be very hot to fantasize about but the actual experience can prove traumatic. It falls under the "be careful what you wish for" cliche. It is completely inappropriate for a first session and at best borderline for a second.

Whether or not rape play is BDSM is open to debate

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#14497 - 05/17/21 05:03 AM Re: Consensual non consent in Pro sessions? [Re: The Thomas]
MsRoseWoods Online   content

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Registered: 06/17/19
Posts: 283
I have submissives come to me looking for non-consensual sessions. It's always funny to see their faces when I get out my samurai sword, and call for Butchie the human boa constrictor! laugh
_________________________
Truth is everybody is going to hurt you: you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.

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#14499 - 05/17/21 06:19 AM Re: Consensual non consent in Pro sessions? [Re: furfan]
ScoobyBelfast Offline
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Registered: 12/12/20
Posts: 288
This sounds like some wild interaction. Maybe I'm an asshole for feeling this way. I hope it doesn't come across wrong. But I look at this as entertainment. If I can't say that I need it to stop or change in plain English, then I don't wouldn't feel safe giving a stranger that control. I'm not knocking this for anyone else but it it isn't for me.

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#14501 - 05/17/21 09:13 AM Re: Consensual non consent in Pro sessions? [Re: furfan]
furfan Online   content
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Registered: 01/20/21
Posts: 416
Just to be clear.....I was talking about CNC in a more narrowly focused context. Something that might involve a specific activity or at least guided by certain hard limits. Not a no limits, no safe word session as seemingly suggested by MsRoseWoods in her post above.

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#14502 - 05/17/21 09:20 AM Re: Consensual non consent in Pro sessions? [Re: The Thomas]
furfan Online   content
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Registered: 01/20/21
Posts: 416
I agree that there needs to be a certain level of experience and trust between the players.
I have never done it t in the context of a first scene nor would I ever recommend that. In all cases I’ve experienced it might turn out to be an unpleasant experience but not one that I ever felt unsafe.

The worst case has always been “well, I won’t do that again!” :)e


Edited by furfan (05/17/21 09:20 AM)

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#14515 - 05/18/21 04:10 AM Re: Consensual non consent in Pro sessions? [Re: furfan]
ScoobyBelfast Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: 12/12/20
Posts: 288
Thanks for the clarification. I'm new to this. It is a whole new world.

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#14517 - 05/18/21 09:54 AM Re: Consensual non consent in Pro sessions? [Re: ScoobyBelfast]
furfan Online   content
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Registered: 01/20/21
Posts: 416
No worries. One thing I have found in BDSM is that sometimes certain terms can mean different things to different people. CNC seems to be one of those terms.

If you Google “consensual non consent” you will get a lot of hits about kinky sex and rape play fantasy

For people into heavy D/s it seems like it’s more about heavier play with few limits and no safe word. ( very edgy by my standards )...something approaching total power exchange

I’ve always used it as a way to experience specific scenarios or activities while still adhering to the principles of RACK and maintaining limits. Things like sensory deprivation bondage for a set time or a specific punishment like XX strokes with a cane.

In any case, whether playing professionally or privately, it requires a great deal of trust and communication between the people involved.

There certainly have been times during these type of sessions that I have regretted the agreement but in the end I have always been glad of the experience. My first experience with overnight bondage came through this type of agreement. I remember being hot, uncomfortable and definitely wanting out at times but in retrospect it was an incredible experience.

If it helps in understanding I think of this as a little bit like skiing a double black diamond run or maybe skydiving. Once you start you are committed grin

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#14532 - 05/19/21 05:05 PM Re: Consensual non consent in Pro sessions? [Re: furfan]
ztrade Online   content
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Registered: 10/26/15
Posts: 344
I think it varies depending on the domme. Some dommes regard it as unsafe or unwise. Others enjoy it or think it is normal!

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#14543 - 05/20/21 05:46 AM Re: Consensual non consent in Pro sessions? [Re: ztrade]
furfan Online   content
Addict

Registered: 01/20/21
Posts: 416
I agree that this activity is certainly in the area of edge play. I think in a pro Domme context it works best with a very experienced Domme who is also comfortable with the sub's maturity and level of experience.

As someone suggested earlier it is easy for some subs to get caught up in a fantasy and "bite off more than they can chew". That's why guardrails are important. Then, in the worst case scenario, the sub has an uncomfortable or unpleasant experience but suffers no real harm.

It's happened to me at least once but the only real consequence was a firm feeling of "Hell no, don't need to do that ever again!' grin

OTOH There have been times that while it was happening I was thinking "You idiot! What have to done?" yet within a few days or weeks I was tempted again.

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