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#10809 - 05/18/20 10:59 AM If You Married A Femdom Would You Take Her Last Name?
Soapy Offline
Sage

Registered: 10/10/15
Posts: 763
Cheyenne brought up this interesting question in another thread.

I didn't want the topic of that thread to be distracted from so I am posting her question here.

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#10810 - 05/18/20 11:05 AM Re: If You Married A Femdom Would You Take Her Last Name? [Re: Soapy]
Soapy Offline
Sage

Registered: 10/10/15
Posts: 763
My answer is conditional.

I think the historical roots of wives & children taking a man's name are based on flawed thinking and oppression.

I also think doing the inverse to make a statement is still reinforcing that tradition and still rests on the same faulty thinking.

I do think there is practical value in a couple and their children all sharing the same last name.

Outside of practical issues I don't have a strong preference for any style of nomenclature.

I would take a woman's last name if doing so had a strong meaning for her and if I agreed with that meaning. I would do it out of my love for her.

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#10811 - 05/18/20 11:12 AM Re: If You Married A Femdom Would You Take Her Last Name? [Re: Soapy]
AssSniffer1999 Offline
Artisan

Registered: 12/11/18
Posts: 97
Loc: Connecticut
I'd rather do a hyphenated last name than changing my last name alltogether.

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#10812 - 05/18/20 11:41 AM Re: If You Married A Femdom Would You Take Her Last Name? [Re: Soapy]
future pet Offline
Artisan

Registered: 12/08/19
Posts: 99
I like my name. It's got long roots, good and bad. Full of reminders. I don't want to surrender it. That being said, I can't ask anyone else to do the same for me.

Could get complicated with kids names I guess.

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#10819 - 05/18/20 12:31 PM Re: If You Married A Femdom Would You Take Her Last Name? [Re: Soapy]
Swordfish Offline
Regular

Registered: 10/31/15
Posts: 127
Loc: California
I would not take anyone else's last name, I can't imagine any conditions under which I'd consider it. Okay, if I were a fugitive from justice, maybe smile

This would be my second marriage, and I'm old enough that I don't have children, so I don't care one whit whether she changes her name or not. I'd be honored and appreciative if she did, but would not mind if she didn't.

I guess the question becomes more interesting if I pretend I were young enough to still have kids

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#10822 - 05/18/20 01:45 PM Re: If You Married A Femdom Would You Take Her Last Name? [Re: Soapy]
gimp Offline
Regular

Registered: 07/25/19
Posts: 114
Loc: NJ, USA
If she ask me too sure. My last name is never pronounced the right way so if hers was easier spell or pronounce even better. I don’t think of a guy taking a woman’s name as a kinky thing as a few guys do for different reasons.

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#10823 - 05/18/20 02:03 PM Re: If You Married A Femdom Would You Take Her Last Name? [Re: Soapy]
Cheyenne Offline

Pooh-Bah

Registered: 07/12/19
Posts: 2310
I would take a woman's last name if doing so had a strong meaning for her and if I agreed with that meaning. I would do it out of my love for her.

That is such a cool feeling on the subject. At the end of the day, if someone is going to be a life partner with someone, they need to care about each other's feelings while being secure about their relationship. As I mentioned in an earlier comment, my daughter is so grieving the loss of her father that she is considering taking his last name back. My son in law is completely cool about it. He'd probably change his too if it made his wife happy. As for me, I'm a traditional person. My late husband and I loved our kinky play but our home life was as vanilla as it gets. (Most of the time.) I wouldn't consider marrying a man if I wouldn't take his last name. Other people feel differently. So, I don't see the big deal over it. In a femdom novel....oh....this could be fun. It has inspired a new video for subbyhubby. I'm thinking about arranged marriages and husband auctions. lol.

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#10824 - 05/18/20 02:20 PM Re: If You Married A Femdom Would You Take Her Last Name? [Re: Cheyenne]
RudolfWhitmer Offline
Warning Potential Troll!
Regular

Registered: 05/01/20
Posts: 103
I think it's almost just implied with marriage in almost all cases that a woman is gonna take the last name. I think it only becomes an issue if the man brings it up. Personally, I think if a man had to make sure or double check if there would be a name change, it would open the door for cheating because he appears insecure. Men are supposed to be proud of their name.

I think the question is easy for anyone who is truly submissive to say yes, I would take the femdom's name, but for me, as someone who just enjoys seeing a woman with a strap on and her tits out, I wouldn't. I have to wonder if a truly dominant female would even marry a submissive male.

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#10825 - 05/18/20 02:29 PM Eh? [Re: RudolfWhitmer]
future pet Offline
Artisan

Registered: 12/08/19
Posts: 99
Quote:
I think if a man had to make sure or double check if there would be a name change, it would open the door for cheating because he appears insecure.


Not following. Are you saying if a woman doesn't want to change her name that would prompt cheating? And that a man is less secure if he doesn't need to endorsement of a woman changing her name to his?

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#10827 - 05/18/20 03:02 PM Re: Eh? [Re: RudolfWhitmer]
future pet Offline
Artisan

Registered: 12/08/19
Posts: 99
It's not 5%. It's more like 20% and an additional 10% hyphenated.

But you're saying the locus of the woman's honor to her commitments is the man's need for proprietary control. If he doesn't have that, he doesn't deserve loyalty and shouldn't be surprised if he doesn't get it.

That's rather dark. Fortunately, I doubt there's more behind it than opinion. Much like the 5%.

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