I've always been tuned to that throbbing, wet sex organ between the ears. The voice of the Dominatrix, Her choice of words, Her dramatic pauses, laughter, commands, changes of tone.... It's like a dazzling light show sweeping over me, disorienting me, putting me in the headspace She wants me in. And letting me out of myself. Adding chastity to it is a huge level-up.

So voice, written words and commands go a long way with me. And without that vocal ability or presence, I am not all that interested in the in-person session that might accompany it.

Conversely, I love silences. That is probably what attracts me most to german bdsm. They just get after it. I love abandonment in strict bondage with little more than "you brought this on yourself, future pet" to comfort me. The time between being situated and bound for a strap-on, flogger, or whatever is next when nothing is said. A hand lightly brushes the flesh that won't be so white in a few moments. Brushes it again when the white is gone, replaced with reds and pinks. A sense of ownership is conveyed without a word. Love it to pieces.

But so much of it is mental or psychological. I can do fairly well with remote control because of the way I'm wired. But I do think a return to in-person is going to absolutely wreck me. Yay.....