OK, but how would you know if she's "truly" a sadist or just telling you she is?

And would it ultimately matter if you wanted to believe she was and you enjoyed the session?

This is *fantasy* after all...

I have good news and bad news.

The good news is they do exist and it does add a level to the session.

The bad news is they are relatively rare. I have known 3 Dommes and 1 Switch that were definitely "genuine sadists" plus one more that was highly probable. Furthermore you are not going to know that they are one right off the bat. There are quite a few Dommes who are very good at pretending that they are much more sadistic than they really are with maso clients. You really have to get know them to be able to tell and that takes s lot of time. There are the subtle signs like the look in their eyes that will let you know.

Another point is that "genuine sadists" are usually not extremists. Rather they are ethical and responsible (OK there are probably a few exceptions out there. I haven't encountered one and to be frank I don't want to). I am a switch and have my own sadistic fantasies that I have acted out but I do not go to extremes. What is good for the goose is good for the gander. Total isomorphism

One last point is that Dommes who are "genuine sadists" have their preferences. Some activities will turn them on but others are just OK. As an example there was a Domme who was extremely turned on by a certain form of CBT I devised but I could never get her to cane with full force.

Bingo.

We like to differentiate ourselves from the psycho- and sociopaths by calling ourselves "ethical sadists". To show that we practice our sadism consciously, with a set of rules and responsibilities. This is, like you said, what you actually want. Someone who wants to hurt you in the way that is mutually enjoyed. And also someone who will tell you when you want to do something or go further than is wise, as "true" masochists by be inclined to do.



Agreed.

I'm sure this Lady would qualify!


https://twitter.com/LadyHera_CH/status/1242397398141489152?s=20

Whoa

For me it is all about the projected attitude and my reflected fear! With the right Domme the symbiosis can be delicious for both parties!