Interesting question, thanks for posting it.

I like a little bit of chatter before the session starts. I am always a little stressed when I first arrive at the session and having a few minutes to relax and decompress enables me to just slide much easier into subspace. Doesn't have to be a lot of time spent in talking before the session, just a few minutes to help me relax and start to focus on what's to come.

Once the session starts I don't need chatter, but if the domme feels like talking that's fine with me. I do enjoy some verbal encouragement during the session, sort of like Domme cheerleading. Things like, "you slut, you know you can take more for me." A little bit of that goes a long way for me and can make a session even more special.

I definitely like a fair bit of talk during the session. However incessant prattle is not good.

Ayn

I have spent quite some time of my life in Europe, the US and a also a bit in Asia.
Sounds all more exciting than it is. I wouldn't assume to be an expert in global BSDM. And my mindset is probably mostly European.

It is not just in the context of BDSM, but in any aspect of life, I like to deal with people who have a healthy self-confidence, who are happy with whom they are.
Who don't have teeth as white that you need to put on sunglasses, and who don't have perfect silicon shaped body-parts, but who are fine with their imperfections.

Back to the subject:
Overplaying it, just sounds and feels "totally fake" as you word it more eloquently than I did. It feels like the dome tries to be somebody she isn't.

To me the biggest fascination in BDSM is power-exchange. And for that I like to play with a self-confident person.

Now I am getting on thin ice:
Overall, and overly generalized: I have the impression that women in Europe have a more natural self-confidence than American women, and the further South or East you go in Europe the higher the self-confidence in regards to their (female) personality, and that reflects on the session.

I could listen to You all day and all night Mistress Ayn

I really don't care how much a Domme likes to talk or not. I have had amazing sessions with Dommes who literally never shut-up about whatever irrelevant stuff pops into their head at the time and just as amazing sessions with Dommes who totally communicate through eye contact, pointing and touch.

However, I really don't like sessions where the Domme expects me to talk (which may seem weird considering how I never STFU outside of session). Thinking and talking completely pulls me out of my submissive headspace, whereas allowing a Domme to lead me where she wants me to go through the use of her verbal skills completely fits for some reason.

I am the total opposite when it comes to faux threats. To me if it’s just an empty threat that I know is just session talk it feels stupid. I need to feel there is at least some possibility that the threat is real. This can come simply from not knowing the Domme well enough that it’s hard for me to judge if she’s serious or from knowing a Domme well enough to know she means what she says or has a dangerous element to her to make the threat seem serious.

Yeah, totally get it. For me, once we have some trust established and I know it's not really a REAL threat, I dig it.

Funny, when I am describing what I like the vibe to be (flirty and fun), I always specifically say "we should be laughing".

Different strokes and all that. I can definitely understand you need to feel that the threat is not just theater.

I have a very quiet personality myself, so I do appreciate dommes who are quiet.

I don't mind some verbal interaction though. Commands and stuff like that is fine, but sometimes verbal interaction just gets awkward for me. Like commanding me to verbally worship or having to tell a domme what "X" smells like when X doesn't smell like anything to me. Maybe most subs like that but for me it's just too much and takes me out of subspace, I prefer to not have to speak too much.
There's a balance that I prefer when it comes to talking during a session.

I find when mentoring or working with the female half of a couple that the hardest thing for them to master is finding their voice. It's all about confidence and if you don't have it as a Domme it all falls flat.

Interesting. I do think that Americans in general tend to focus more on the superficial. I see that in subs too, so it cuts both ways.