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#3556 - 06/15/19 10:34 PM
Re: Social media, politics and Dommes
[Re: Mistress Ayn]
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Artisan
Registered: 06/15/19
Posts: 70
Loc: New York
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I can see how others might feel differently, but personally, I enjoy learning about the political beliefs of the Dommes I see. I value a personal connection, and to understand someone's politics is to understand a part of who they are and how they think. I don't have to have identical politics as a Domme, but if I find a particular belief ethically dubious, it would affect my choice of continuing to see her. For example, I wouldn't want to see a Domme who is racist.
You can't choose your family, so I have to deal with my racist uncle Wilbur. But, thankfully I can choose my friends and I can choose my Dommes. Politics is just one part of that decision.
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#3558 - 06/16/19 12:17 AM
Re: Social media, politics and Dommes
[Re: Mistress Ayn]
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Artisan
Registered: 10/26/15
Posts: 76
Loc: SoCal
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I want no reference to political leanings. Even not involving Dommes, there is too much anger and partisanship out there ruining friendships. I wish it was less in the world overall, but definitely want none of it in my escape from the real world.
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#3564 - 06/16/19 12:33 PM
Re: Social media, politics and Dommes
[Re: tabula]
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Regular
Registered: 10/31/15
Posts: 127
Loc: California
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There's an extent to which I agree with this, tabula. As I get to know a domme, our relationship will turn more personal, and we might explore many topics as we get to know each other -- everything from favorite comedies, to religion or politics. But the original question is about what she puts on social media. Politics or religion or how she feels about capital punishment or any other number of heavy topics may be totally appropriate, as a private discussion. It's when it's part of her social media, and marketing outreach, where I find it unwelcome.
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#3565 - 06/16/19 01:33 PM
Re: Social media, politics and Dommes
[Re: Swordfish]
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Artisan
Registered: 06/15/19
Posts: 70
Loc: New York
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Swordfish, sorry you find information on social media about a Domme's political opinions to be unwelcome. I value a Domme's decision to (often bravely) share her opinions and speak up for things she believes in any forum, social media or otherwise. Often they can be marginalized in our puritanical society. Sharing on social media can help them feel supported by others in their profession and those who seek to be their allies. It can provide a sense of community and acceptance. Don't we want our Dommes to feel seen and supported, so they can exude the strength and confidence we love to see them express?
But I also feel like I often learn something from the political expressions of Dommes. I would know almost nothing about FOSTA/SESTA with out them. I wouldn't understand how Dommes and other SWs are discriminated against at banks and how cashless businesses present real problems for them. I want to know about how there lives are affected by our politician's decisions so that I can know how best to support them.
My dentist is not a cavity-filling machine, just like my Domme is not a fetish dispensing machine. These wonderful women are not just Dommes, they are multi-faceted human beings just like everyone else.
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#3566 - 06/16/19 01:52 PM
Re: Social media, politics and Dommes
[Re: tabula]
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Regular
Registered: 10/31/15
Posts: 127
Loc: California
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My dentist is not a cavity-filling machine, just like my Domme is not a fetish dispensing machine. These wonderful women are not just Dommes, they are multi-faceted human beings just like everyone else.
Your dentist -- and your lawyer, and your doctor -- are a perfect example. Chances are, one or more of them have social media, web pages, other outreach. If your dentist is like mine, that media is absolutely devoid of political content (go look -- I'm sure it's true) ... except, perhaps, something that we might seek common cause for, like some bill that regulates fluoride or whatever. To me, that's what business outreach should look like. I actually do know about my cardiologist's political views, in detail -- we needle each other over politics all the time, in private, in the office. But he recognizes that patients coming to his webpage or whatever to seek his services probably shouldn't be subjected to his political views -- his marketing outreach across various media is professional. These wonderful women are not just Dommes, they are multi-faceted human beings just like everyone else.
You're saying that as if you're teaching me something I don't know. My dentist and my doctor are multi-faceted human beings just like everyone else also. They've made the smart decision not to bombard patients with their political views on social media. In fact, none of my cherished providers of services, from my doctor to my CMT to my plumber, post about their political views on their social media. Why are dommes different than everyone else? Should they be subject to lower standards for some reason? Anyway, I respect your alternative view that you welcome domme political views, not trying to invalidate your feelings or be argumentative; I just disagree, and don't see why dommes shouldn't follow the high standards of other skilled providers of services. Political views for which we should all have common cause -- FOSTA/SESTA, in the case of pro dommes -- being the common exception.
Edited by Swordfish (06/16/19 02:09 PM)
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#3569 - 06/16/19 08:05 PM
Re: Social media, politics and Dommes
[Re: Swordfish]
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Artisan
Registered: 06/15/19
Posts: 70
Loc: New York
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Swordfish, much respect for your willingness to discuss the question. I understand we're unlikely to come to agreement and that's ok.
Why are Dommes different from dentists, lawyers and doctors? As I mentioned, the former are marginalized by society while the latter are not. For me, that in itself is enough to justify them using social media to organize and mobilize around political issues (not that any justification is needed). Also, it seems like there is so much political apathy lately. Quite frankly, it's just nice to see political passion and engagement from this younger generation. It gives me hope.
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#3571 - 06/16/19 08:46 PM
Re: Social media, politics and Dommes
[Re: Mistress Ayn]
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Artisan
Registered: 12/11/18
Posts: 97
Loc: Connecticut
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I have no issue with dommes posting on their professional social media pages about stuff like Sex worker rights and stuff like that, but it's when they start plastering political opinions outside of that, that i'm not a big fan of. Unless I strongly disagree with sentiments they express though it probably won't stop me from sessioning with one I intend on seeing.
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#3572 - 06/16/19 10:31 PM
Re: Social media, politics and Dommes
[Re: Mistress Ayn]
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Regular
Registered: 10/19/15
Posts: 162
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I suppose BDSM experiences provide many different outcomes for the people who seriously engage in it. For me, the BDSM experience has always been one that is powerfully cathartic and absolutely joyful.
I think the key to that outcome is to a great extent dependent on having the most positive connection possible with the Domme you are serving. So in my case, anything that detracts from that connection, such as an overly aggressive and intolerant expression of their political preferences simply detracts from the power of that connection. If I don't feel that connection, as I did with you, then it makes it unlikely that I will want to session with that Domme.
I certainly respect the right of anyone to express their political preferences in whatever language they choose, but I agree with you that there is a good chance that it could cost them some clients. I also believe that some Dommes who feel that strongly don't care if they lose clients, and that is of course their decision as well.
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#3575 - 06/17/19 05:50 AM
Re: Social media, politics and Dommes
[Re: Mistress Ayn]
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Addict
Registered: 10/30/15
Posts: 422
Loc: Paris, France
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I don't think political views have anything to do with my sessions, so I keep them off my social media, except SESTA/FOSTA. This does directly affect my practice.
Not only do I think politics should be private, but also, my opinions change as I have more information. No need to keep track of this. I'll do it on my own.
I think political talk can only harm. A fellow domme here aligned herself with the Gilets Jaunes early in the movement and completely alienated her base.
_________________________
I've broken all my toys. Would you like to be broken?
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#3605 - 06/19/19 12:14 PM
Re: Social media, politics and Dommes
[Re: Domina M]
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Occasional
Registered: 06/17/19
Posts: 29
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I agree with you Domina M. I know everyone has their own opinion about politics and how they feel and how they vote is their right. But sometimes I read things that mistresses say on line and it effects how i feel about them and that's not what i want to have happen right especially right before a session. I follow you on twitter and I respect that you don't do this.
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