This was a problem for me a long time ago when I did not know that you can express yourself and negotiate. Right now no humiliation is something I write in my first email to a new mistress. Frankly I never had a problem with it since.

> You dont have to be weak to be a sub in a relationship

Actually, I find that its the opposite. Subs are strong, they just give that strength, that power, to the Domme. Its refreshing. Its different. Its exciting.

> when i engage in chastity play its because i love the feeling of giving up control.

Exactly. Its about control. Its the ultimate in tease and denial.

I completely agree. As I have posted before I started as a college kid, got in and out of the scene over the years, and realize now as a very mature male who continues to do a few sessions that you must be strong - physically and emotionally - to be a sub. I feel I've gotten stronger, open to more experiences and activities and being more comfortable in my own skin.

Let me stir the pot a little.

Do you mean in a relationship or in a session? You have more of a point for a session, not so much for a relationship.

I think that you should bring all you can in a relationship you care about and doing less than that is an abdication of responsibility.

To tell you the truth this is one of my main objections to slavery and submission.

Hi, I enjoy a similar kink. I enjoy physical humiliation but not verbal humiliation. How can I express this clearly to a Domme without eliminating interesting activities?

I enjoy humiliation but only a certain type -- if she presses the wrong buttons, it snaps me right out of subspace. I communicate all this by giving her context and examples. Context example: "our dynamic should be fun, sensual, flirty, we should laugh a lot. It should not be strict, mean, yelly/screamy, etc. Bratty or entitled princess countenance encouraged."

Then I give examples of what kind of humiliation I like or don't like.

Don't like: Don't speak in absolutes about me, I'll snap right out of subspace. Don't say things like -- You're a bitch. You're not a real man. You're a piece of shit.

Do highlight how I'm submissive or inferior TO YOU: You're my bitch. I own you. How does it feel knowing you get your ass fucked, and you can only worship mine?